What's underneath the idea of goal setting is behavioral changes. And what's true about behavioral changes is they require repetition and it requires support and it requires time.
Scott Nelson is a MedTech enthusiast, ambitious doer, and curious by nature. Scott and his partner Justin, created Joov the first professional-grade, full-body red light therapy device designed for convenient, in-home use.
Endorsed by doctors, athletes, health professionals and many more, Joov, light therapy stimulates our cells and boosts cellular energy. In addition, to enhancing skin health and muscle recovery, clinical research has shown light therapy can improve the body’s ability to lose weight. There are numerous clinical studies that provide how red and near-infrared light therapy is effective including physical and emotional health/well-being.
What are the benefits of red light therapy?
The benefits are very wide-ranging. It helps achieve enhanced skin health. It helps in wrinkle reduction, enhances peek athletic performance, improves cognitive and sexual performance. All these benefits come from red light therapy and they are all clinically proven. This field is not well known but it is an emerging field. It has been around the mid 20th century.
What is the easiest way through which people can use red-light therapy?
The easiest and least expensive way to get light therapy is to get natural sunlight. Many people try to avoid going out in sun and prefer to wear a sunblock when out in sun. However, the reality is that the full-spectrum sun is very healthy not in a way we typically use it. It is very healthy to spend some time under the sun on daily basis. Scott says the easiest way is by starting to make sure we spend some time under the natural light and also light in general. Studies have been conducted on how some types of artificial lights can have negative ramifications on our health and disturb our circadian rhythm.
Do you think excessive use of digital devices is affecting our health?
Our body responds to different lights in different ways. Our ancestors were not surrounded by artificial light and spent most of the time outside. Their main sources of light were sun and in some cases, candles. Since the mid 20th century, due to the advancement in technology and consistent presence of digital devices in our lives, we are exposed to artificial light almost all the time. Our biological systems cannot adapt that fast to the overexposure of artificial light. From a high level, it is about understanding the core principle that our bodies have adapted to natural sunrise and sunset and light helps us to adjust our circadian rhythm.
Since red light therapy can generate new cells, can it also improve communication between cells?
Scott says red-light therapy has the ability to improve communication between cells. In fact, there is some well-understood mechanisms of actions involving light therapy and there are also some emerging mechanisms that seem to be happening but are not understood by academic researchers at the moment. When it comes to well-understood mechanisms, they can be further divided into two categories; primary and secondary. Primarily at a high level, these wavelengths of light help produce more mitochondria at a cellular level. A byproduct of this is better communication at a cellular level.
Can you tell us a little about your products?
If we want to use Scott’s product for red light therapy, first we need to make sure if we are not able to get enough natural sunlight. His products are more of a supplement. There are a couple of things you need to look out for when buying such a product. You need to make sure that the device you are using has been clinically proven to provide lights of certain wavelengths. You also need to look out for a device that provides enough power so your
treatment times are short. You do not want to buy yourself a product and then go on to use it for hours in a day.
How do you think your product can help us enhance our performance in our lives?
Scott says he does not aim to treat for something general through his products. He primarily uses light therapy to deal with health-related issues.
Scott says that most of the people who are into health and into performance, they make sure their diet is optimized, they want to make sure their sleep is optimized. If you are going to supplement with something, you want to make sure you supplement with the right things. Scott says one thing that always gets ignored in the process is the importance of light and its pivotal role in optimal health and performance.
Has red light therapy shown any evidence to cure cancer?
Scott says it is a question he has come across many times in recent times. He had the opportunity to co-author and publish a paper on light therapy and cancer. It was published in early 2018. At a high level, it does appear to show evidence to cure cancer. However, there is also some studies that showcase that light therapy can actually promote tumor growth because theoretically, you are helping the infected cells grow hence contributing in tumor growth. There is some conflicting research on this topic.
What is the best advice you have ever been given?
Within a business context, the best advice he has ever been given is the actually the concept of ready, fire and aim. Scott likes to invest his time and energy in startups, he likes to build up businesses from scratch.
How can we connect with you?
You can find more about Scott, his work and his products through his website.
His website’s URL is:
We're human beings. I make mistakes all the time. By no means am I a perfect mom and I am not trying to be perfect.
After living in New York as a Comedian, Sara Polon, hit rock bottom and took a hard look at the direction she was going in life. Sara had an Ah-HA moment when she read the book, The Omnivore’s Dilemma, which inspired her to get involved in the local food movement. After all she grew up on her Mom’s natural, freshly cooked and delicious soup, she got the idea to come back to her hometown in Washington DC. In 2008 she started Soupergirl with her mother to bring locally inspired, nutritious, and delicious soup to the hungry citizens of Washington, DC, and beyond. This mom-daughter duo can tell you, in clear conscience, that their soups are very healthy. They believe if you can’t pronounce something on the ingredient list, it should not be in the soup. Their soups are all plant-based and kosher filled with fresh, local veggies, grains, beans, and other wholesome goodness. The mission at Soupergirl isn’t just about soup - it’s about our food system. Soupergirl believes in real, responsible food and supports their local farming community. So that the planet, consumer, community, farmers, and laborers all win. As they grow, they believe they can inspire even bigger changes. One spoonful at a time. Recently, they were featured on ABC’s Shark Tank.
What was the first soup that you made?
Sara started the business with her mother back in 2008. She does not remember the first soup she made. She started her business by hosting gatherings on weekly basis and her mother would cook all the test recipes she had prepared. Sara would then share samples with all the guests, gather their opinions about different soups and that is how she was able to build the basis of her brand. She developed a database of 100 different soups. She launched her business in November 2008.
Why did you choose soup to start your business?
According to Sara, soup is the perfect food with high nutrition. It contains less fat and if it is prepared properly, it can have all the necessary proteins, fibers and nutrients in it. Sara wanted to get involved in the local food movement by being able to cook differently. She wanted to make an impact and she felt soup was a great way to incorporate healthy food in the lives of people around her.
How did you transition from being a comedian to being in the food business?
When Sara was doing comedy, she was working for different companies. She was not really passionate about her work and it was slowly starting to get to her. She has always had a very short attention span. Her breakthrough moment came when she was on a flight and read Michael Pollan’s book ‘The Omnivore’s Dilemma’. She had never understood the importance of local food movement before. After reading the book, she felt a need to get involved in the local food movement. She was considering a few different options around that time. She wanted to start her own business and her ideas revolved around incorporating comedy and health together.
How did you start the business?
Sara initially had a partner who backed out in the early stages of her business. After that, she got her mother involved in the business who was willing to help her. Though her mother had no idea what she was getting into.
Were you ever skeptical or in doubt about succeeding in your business?
Sara thinks when you are a small business owner, there is a constant struggle against self-doubts. Sometimes, in the morning she has this energy and feels like she is going to conquer the world today and then later in the day she feels tired or demotivated due to various reasons. The food industry is very hard, there is a lot of competition.
How do you maintain your mindset and focus?
Sara believes in herself and in her business. She believes her business is meant to grow because she is staying true to her passion towards food. She also performs meditation that helps her control her stress.
Why do you think the food system is broken?
People are far removed from where their food comes from. We usually go to the supermarket and everything is neatly packaged in there. We are not connected with how that food item gets to our shopping cart or to the supermarket shelf. We need to be connected with how the food we buy from the supermarket is prepared, who prepared it, how it was farmed. With her business, she is trying to create awareness among people to be more involved with their food and its story.
What do you think has had the biggest impact on your growth?
Sara thinks her customers have had the biggest impact on the growth. They have promoted the business as well by spreading the word about the business. Sara has a community of fans which many brands do not have. Sara considers herself to be lucky to have such fans.
How did you come up with this name for your brand?
Sara brainstormed with her family and friends for the name. She had a vision of the illustration. She knew people will be able to relate with the name and that it adds flavor, it adds humor and relates to what she was trying to do.
Did you ever have a business plan?
Sara initially had a business plan but she was never able to finish it. It has gone through several iterations over the years. Sara believes business plan needs to be a living documentation, it needs to change with time.
How has your business changed ever since you aired on Shark Tank?
Sara has decided to ship her products nationwide. Every person in the country can now get her food. She was able to set up meetings with major grocery chains and was able to put her products in their stores.
What is your favorite soup?
It really depends on Sara’s mood and time of day. She usually prefers her ginger butternut soup. In summers, she prefers the chilled watermelon gazpacho. Sara also says there is nothing like a lentil soup with simple vegetables.
What is the best advice you have ever been given?
The best advice she has ever been given is to never stop believing. Someone said to her that her biggest challenge was going to be staff. She believes anticipating your company's needs, hiring people and planning accordingly is very important for company’s prosperity. You have to be proactive and think three steps ahead.
What are you proud of?
Sara is not where she wants to be, it keeps her hungry and it keeps her motivated. She says she is not proud of anything as yet.
How can we connect with you?
In 1999 I was a senior in high school and I had a huge opportunity in front of me. I was about to play in the Maryland State tennis championship tournament. I had been playing tennis competitively for the past nine years. I had hit a bunch of forehands bunch of backhands overhead volley serves all the strokes. I had spent years practicing but there was something that happened when I played tournaments. Sometimes I would do really well and I would win matches. And then there were times where I would lose to players that I could have beaten. I couldn't tell the difference in my performance. Why did I win sometimes and lose other times?
There was something crucial that was missing which I wasn't aware of. Up until this tournament. So here I was about to play in this tournament that I was seeded number two which means I was expected to come in second place. But I knew I could win this tournament. I knew I could be the Maryland State tennis champion and my mom found this ad in the newspaper. This was back in the day before the Internet was super popular. She found an ad in the paper that was for a sports psychologist. She called her and I ended up going to her house which was about 20 minutes away from my house and meeting with this woman, C.J. Lockman. I would go to her house weekly for several weeks. I sat on her couch and we would talk about mental strategies to improve my performance. We would do things like visualization where I would picture myself winning the Maryland State tennis tournament and not just picture it. I would feel it.
I would rehearse this vision over and over again even at home before I would go to sleep at night. I really would get into the feeling of it. We also did things like anchoring technique which is a quick way to shift your focus. And for me and what we talked about a shift is fixing my strings so I would look at my racquet and I would fix my strings to trigger a positive emotion and get me back into focus. And we also used techniques such as mantras where I would say positive things about my forehand works perfectly and smoothly and we would talk about how many times I had hit a four forehand how many times I had a backhand so on and so forth just really reminding myself that I had the ability to win and becoming the woman that could win this tournament. So I spent a lot of time mentally preparing for this tournament and then the day arrived where the two where it was time to play in the tournament in Baltimore Maryland. And this was in May. So the weather was beautiful was crisp. The sun was out. We didn't have any rain. The whole tournament. And we got there and I won the first couple matches pretty easily as expected. And then I was in the finals and in the first set I went down three games to one and I went back to my strings. I started to focus. I got into tune and I turned it on and I got into the zone. I was hitting forehands angles coming to the net. I had a whole strategy there and I won the next five games and I won the first set 6-3 and I went on to win the second set 6-2. I easily won this tournament it was the first tournament I had ever won like a breeze and the amazing thing was I was calm throughout the entire tournament. I wasn't nervous. It was I had mentally prepared so much that all I needed to do was show up as if my body already knew what to do and so it became very clear to me the difference in the experience of playing in this tournament in comparison to so many other tournaments's that I had played earlier in my tennis career. I believe the most underutilized resource is within us and it's our mental preparation. Whether it be with your job. Sure you've sent a bunch of emails we've made a bunch of phone calls we know what to do. It's not that I didn't know how to hit forehands right. It's just that I didn't take the time to mentally prepare. Pick any area of your life that is maybe not going as smoothly as you want whether it be your relationships or your health and what's missing a lot of the time is that we haven't actually set ourselves up with a strategy with how to utilize our internal resources focusing techniques you know the thing is is that it sounds so incredibly simple yet it's so difficult to get focused especially in today's world with so many distractions. Focus is the most important element of excellence. What's probably getting in your way right now is that you're not focusing properly. If there is an area that you're stuck in is that you're not focusing properly.
Let's flip this for a moment. Think of an area in your life that you're doing really well in and you're happy about how much attention and focus do you give that area to your life. Now it might not seem like you give a lot of attention and focus to that area of your life becomes because it comes so easily and naturally to you because you naturally focus on what you want and care about in this particular area. So if you're excelling in a certain area you're doing a really good job at focusing and maybe even you've gotten to the point where you don't even have to think so much because it's become so natural to you the other day I was at one of my friend's house and I was there with my son and she has three kids and her daughter who's about eight or nine years old got a splinter in her toe and she was crying and saying, "Mommy my foot hurts. I'm in so much pain." And she was focused on the pain in her toe and she was crying. And my son went to go give her a hug. In a moment she shifted from crying and being upset to oh and her face lit up because she saw my son approach her and hug her now it wasn't that the pain in her foot went away but she shifted her focus and attention and it changed her state.
It was amazing to watch how quickly we can shift our focus and that's where our power is. Today I want to invite you to hone in on an area that you're not giving a lot of attention to. Maybe you're thinking about the problems in that area and start to focus on mentally preparing yourself for success and creating positive images around that area of that you want to focus on and creating a positive mantra and shifting a thought a negative thought to a positive thought we can change our focus at any given moment. Tony Robbins says, "What's wrong is always available and so is what's right." And it depends on where you put your focus on what you focus on you feel. So if you're not feeling so great about something you can change your focus - that's where your true power is.
At this time of year, there are all sorts of emotions that arising and if we can strengthen our inner world, our inner resources, and emotional fitness.. aside from the content or context of our lives -- the things that are going outside of us, if we develop tools to become more conscious and aware we can live a happier, more peaceful and fulfilled life. WHich let’s be honest -- we all want more of this.
In particular today, I want to focus on how you judge yourself and others, and how judgment can be a destroyer of happiness. You might judge yourself for showing up to another Thanksgiving without a romantic partner, or without pursuing your dream/aspiration of having your own business. You could be judging yourself about your weight or health, or whatever you didn’t accomplish this year that you want to be different. You might judge others, your family for your unmet needs or wishing others to be different and judging the way the way they are living their lives. And when you judge yourself or others harshly -- you might also notice some anger there. I think of anger as judgment's best friend. Anger is often a byproduct of judgment.
And then the ultimate judgment -- judging ourselves for judging. I want to be clear that this is not an exercise to make judgment wrong or make ourselves wrong but it’s the very opposite. Can I bring loving presence and mindfulness to whatever is arising WITHOUT judgment? Can I create some space between the feelings, thoughts, and sensations that arise? How to bring in more love to the table?
I want to share a story with you that I heard when I attended the psychotherapy networker event here in WashingtonD.C. I had the opportunity to see one of my favorite spiritual teachers Jack Kornfield. He is the author of one of my favorite books, A Path with Heart. He grew up in very difficult conditions and in his early adulthood, he went to Thailand to study Buddhist meditation. He is known for combining his spiritual teachings with Western Psychology.
At the event I attended several months ago, Jack Kornfield told a story and that stuck with me about mindfulness and during dealing with difficult sensations -- and I want to share with you. He told a story about a young Marine with deeper anger issues who he worked with to feel into his body in such a way that he was able to to be more aware of when his anger was triggered. Through ‘coming back to his senses’, he was able to create a conscious space in which all his reactions could be experienced from enough distance to allow a sort of loving calm in the middle of his storms.
Here's here's this how the story goes:
"The soldier was at the supermarket at the end of a tough evening, the lines were long, and a couple people ahead of him was a woman holding a baby with too many items in her cart. This triggered his anger immediately and his mind raged with angry assessments: “I’m exhausted, these lines are ridiculous, she shouldn’t be in the express lane but of course she doesn’t even think about where she is…” To make matters worse, the woman hands the baby over to the cashier, another woman who cooed and snuggled, and so the line was held up even longer. And the officer suddenly realized, “Oh! This is anger!” and he started to breathe deeply, sense his tense, contracting body, observe his pain and anguish, and become aware of the stories he was telling in his mind. In a few moments, something in him started to relax and open. He looked out again and saw that, oh, he’s actually a cute kid.
When he got up to the cashier, he said, “That was a cute little boy.”
“Oh, did you like him?” she said, “He’s my boy. You see, my husband was killed in Iraq last year, so now I have to work two jobs now. My mom takes care of him and she brings him in so I can say goodnight to him.”"
This story makes me quite emotional because we're so quick to judge -- to come to decisions or conclusions about ourselves or others. Especially at a busy time of year, when we're moving into the holidays and we might have to wait in long lines and we can easily see the judgemental mind rearing its head. And we can just begin to notice the quality of a judgemental mind -- it's agitated. “Why is this person in the express lane when they should have been in the other lane.” Or judging ourselves “I ate too much food. What’s wrong with me?”
There's a little process that this story about the Marine illustrates. Which is first to name the emotion. Whether that be “anger” to name the anger. The second step is to notice the sensation in the body. Notice how the body is contracting or feel into any tight sensations. The third step is just to observe the inner dialogue which is typically negative and to see if you can become aware of your thoughts with some space around it. Can you start to relax and open? Is there an opportunity to say something kind to someone like the Marine did, “Oh that's a cute little boy,” or maybe say something kind to yourself. Can you take a deeper fuller breath?
Born in Chicago, but raised in South Florida, Jennifer Gottlieb worked as child actor and went on to study musical theatre, film, and television at both The Hartt School and The American Musical and Dramatic Academy in New York City. Jen landed her dream role, and received rave reviews playing Linda in the Broadway national tour of the Tony Award-nominated musical comedy “The Wedding Singer". In 2010, Jen joined the cast of VH!’s That Metal Show. While living on the road and doing lots of performing Jennifer learned the importance of personal well-being, which sparked her career as a fitness and nutrition expert. She became a certified personal trainer and weight-loss specialist from The National Academy of Sports Medicine, Jennifer built a successful business training a large roster of celebrities and many of Manhattan's elite. Now Jen is the co-creator of Unfair Advantage Live with her partner Chris Winfield (who was also Interview on the podcast). Unfair advantage is an opportunity to be “in the room” with the media, influencers & gatekeepers that can turn you into a recognized expert and help you get the publicity you want... and deserve.
How do you think your childhood influenced on who you are today?
Jen was raised by parents who always believed in her. They supported her right from her childhood and made her believe she could achieve whatever she wanted to achieve in her life. They wanted her to try everything in her childhood including karate, gymnastics, karate, horse-riding, dancing, and singing. Jen always felt free to do whatever she wanted to do. She believes it was both a good and bad decision from her parents. It was good because it allowed her to be comfortable in picking up something and giving up if she did not like it. It was bad because Jen developed this habit of not being able to commit to anything for a longer period of time. She was not able to become an expert in anything she would pick.
What was your breaking moment for your success as an actor?
When Jen moved to New York, she did not have a lot of connections to start with. She went to see one of her friends, who was on the show called ‘The Wedding Singer’ on Broadway. She watched the show, looked at her friend play a particular role. She had an emotional response to the show and aspired to play the same role that her friend was playing. During this time, Jen got herself a book for personal development that was recommended to her by someone. She started to believe that she could create the life she dreamt for herself. She eventually auditioned for The Wedding Singer show for the role of Linda. When she appeared for the audition, there were a thousand other contestants auditioning for the same role. However, it did not bother much to Jen because she had created that belief in her mind that if we put in all the effort and hard work for things that we want in our lives, we succeed, eventually. This belief helped her get to the last round of audition where she was up against another contestant. It was the other contestant who actually got the part. Jen was not devastated by the results. This is because Jen did not give up and still believed she would play that role at some point later in her life. Jen soon went in for another audition that was not for The Wedding Singer and was certainly not for the role of Linda. However, she wore the same clothes as she wore when she auditioned for Linda’s role and even sang the same songs. The director was very impressed by Jen’s performance, gave her his contact card and told her they would meet very soon for work. Over the next few months, Jen would send him an email every week to which she would never get a response back from the director. This happened for six months until she finally got a reply via email. A contract was also attached in the mail. Jen was selected to play the role of Linda for the second tour of The Wedding Singer.
What has been one of your biggest insecurities?
Jen has faced body image issues in her past. That has been her biggest insecurity in recent past. She has also dealt with an eating disorder in her young adulthood. She had a big insecurity with her singing skills as well. She always doubted her singing skills. Jen thinks the issues she had with her body held her back in trying out many things in her life.
What has your career looked like after you worked in The Wedding Singer?
After the tour, Jen started to audition again for different shows. She eventually landed a role in an MTV Classic show called ‘That Metal Show’. She was perfect for the role because she had played a similar role in her last show. Jen had a great first season with the show. However, for the second season, the show directors and producers told Jen that they were going to shoot in LA but if she wanted to continue her role, she had to pay for her travel and bear accommodation expenses on her own. A lot of close friends advised Jen not to accept this offer because this eventually meant Jen had to spend more money than what she was going to earn from her role in the second season. However, Jen felt that if she managed to reprise her role in the second season, she would become irreplaceable in the show. That is exactly what happened because when Jen appeared for the second season, she got herself a bigger role, got paid a lot more money and went on to perform in that show for the next 14 seasons.
Can you tell us a little bit about Unfair Advantage and your role in the company?
Chris Winfield started this company and Jen partnered up with him. Chris and Jen conduct three-day events in New York City. They have three events per year. These events are for entrepreneurs who are struggling to establish their presence, who are not able to develop connections and who cannot promote their work and services in media. These events are about what you can do for others and not what you expect others do for you. The event is all about helping others build connections. On the second day of their event, they bring in the media to cover the event. This allows entrepreneurs to easily develop authentic connections with the media. They can get themselves featured as well.
What is the best advice you have ever been given?
The best advice she has ever been given is by one of her friends who said to her that when we stop thinking about what other people think about us.
How can we connect with you?
You can find more about her through her website. Her website’s URL is
As a working mother of two boys, Kristin Mika launched Hampton Paper Designs on a whim on Memorial Day Weekend of 2007. After being unable to find the cards she was looking for that was charming and classic for her son Jackson, she decided to create her own line. Hampton Paper Designs combines her lifelong love of paper & letter writing — Beautiful watercolors inspires the stationery line. Hampton Paper Designs has so many great products. with the opportunity to express all human emotions, joy, thanks, sympathy, humor, and love and more. Whether it be with a calendar, invitation, journal, wrapping paper, notepads or stickers. All of the designs on the finest papers are reflective of the effortless style of a summer in the Hamptons: uncluttered, simply elegant, effortless sophistication.
What inspired you and how did you get started with this business?
It happened after the birth of her son Jackson. She wanted to get some new calling cards for him and so she went to a local shop. She did not love what she bought and it was also a bit expensive. Upon her return to home, she started to wonder what would happen if she started to make her own stationery. Her father’s girlfriend who at that time was a water-color artist had recently made cards for Kristin’s older son Thomas for special occasions like Halloween and Valentine’s day. She decided to take those water-color images and make stationary out of it. She called Lucy (her father’s girlfriend) and asked her to paint a few more water-color images. She made notecards and notepads out of those images and got them printed. This is how this business of paper design started for Kristin.
Did you ever think you would love to have a paper company?
Kristin is not sure if she really wanted to own a paper company. However, she has always been a paper person and she has always loved paper. Her parents got divorced when Kristin was quite young and she would write and send a lot of letters to her father. She would spend hours to pick up the right stationery before writing letters. Kristin used to design her own stationery in her childhood.
Do you think we should still rely on conventional methods of communication?
Kristin agrees and believes when it comes to business or personal relations, sometimes it is better to write messages with your own hands and that too on a paper. She writes thank you notes all the time. She just went to a dinner party a few weeks ago and upon her return from the party, she wrote a note to the woman who had hosted that party. The response she gets from people is always overwhelming. They are appreciative of the fact that even in today’s digital world, Kristin is considerate enough to spare some time and write for them.
Can you share how you got on The Today Show for the first time?
Kristin sent her Hershey kit stickers to Hamptons magazines. They got featured and soon she got a call from Jill Martin from The Today Show. She had seen the stickers in the magazines and wanted to feature Kristin’s products on the show. The whole experience to appear on the show was overwhelming for Kristin. Her orders grew soon afterward she appeared on the show.
What is your best selling product?
Her best selling products are calendars. She makes different types of calendars. One of these includes desk calendars which feature one image and glitter the images by hand. This has been her top-selling product for many years. There is a great community of people who love these calendars and give away these calendars as gifts to other people. She also gave away an option in which clients can pick twelve different images of their choice for their calendar. Kristin believes this is a great and unique idea as you get an opportunity to pick up images that can depict the coming events in your life.
How do you suggest your customers to buy products that are best for their need?
Kristin tries to put herself in the shoes of her customers. She tries to find out their likes/dislikes, what it is they like to shop. She herself prefers to give away gifts that are actually of some use to people. This is why calendars are such a great gift because they can be used on daily basis. One of the easiest ways to make a gift special is by personalizing it with the name or a monogram of the person to whom you are giving the gift. It shows that you have put in an extra level of effort for the gift and that it was just created for the person you are giving to.
What advice do you have for someone who has a business idea but is not sure how to start?
It is really not that hard to start your own business if you have a good idea to start with. Kristin never created a business plan for Hampton Paper design, her business was established out of her passion for the work she does. Once you take the initial steps, you learn every day about the dynamics of running a business.
What is your secret to planning a great party?
Kristin’s secret to plan a party is to be prepared for it. Everything boils down to preparation. She usually starts with the plan with weeks in advance. She mainly focuses on the themes for a party. Kristin believes the key to planning a successful party is to be prepared. You can also find many ideas on the Internet in planning a party or an event.
Can you give some examples of themes you have used in past?
She planned ‘The Back to School’ themed party for her son Jackson when he was in kindergarten. She has also planned parties with movie themes. Over the years, the parties Kristin has arranged for her children were usually a depiction of their current interests. Her son Thomas was interested in pirates and she conducted a party with a treasure hunt theme.
What is the best advice you have ever been given?
The best advice she has ever been given comes from her great-grandmother. She used to tell her to use her best items every day. They are great words to live by.
How can we connect with you?
You can find more about her work through her website. Her website’s URL is
How did you get featured in The New York Times at the beginning of your coaching career?
It happened after her coach training program. She was very excited after finishing the program as she felt she found her life-purpose through that program. She was the youngest woman in the program. However, she put in all of her passion, energy and time in the program. She was able to grow her coaching practice quickly. The head of the school where Jeannine was undergoing her training was approached for the article and was asked if he wanted to refer somebody to feature in the magazine. He referred Jeannine and she invited the interviewer to receive her coaching rather than opting for a conventional interview. Jeannine feels it is difficult to put in words the art of coaching and that is why she thought it would be better if she invited the interviewer for a coaching session. The interviewer attended several of her coaching sessions and wrote in a very positive manner about Jeannine and her business. He also put her photo as the cover photo of the whole article.
Did you ever have limiting beliefs about becoming a life coach?
Before becoming a life coach, Jeannine tried her luck in acting and become a theatre artist. Her niche as a performer was to play silly characters. She was always playing a blonde with a high-pitched voice. One of the reasons Jeannine left acting was because she did not found her purpose in it. She felt she was not able to put an accurate representation of her personality through acting.
Do you think having a difficult childhood helped you access your inner wisdom?
Jeannine is not sure if having a difficult childhood can always help you access inner wisdom. Jeannine thinks there are a lot of factors that can contribute towards wisdom. Jeannine thinks the fact that contributed to her inner wisdom was her participation in her father’s meetings. From a very early age, she would go on meetings with her father. One of the things all the participants did in the meetings was to share their life stories. They would talk about their feelings, about their challenges and various other things. Jeannine learned a lot through these meetings and believes it gave her an access to the wisdom of self-reflection, self-responsibility, self-healing, and self-potential. She would see people who had gone through the worse circumstances in their lives and were somehow able to recover from their worst times.
What were your parents addicted to?
Jeannine says her parents were almost addicted to all drugs. Her father was one of the most famous drug dealers in Long Beach. He did cocaine, PCP, speed(Amphetamine) and meth.
How did you realize you were not meant to be an actor?
Jeannine felt something was out of order in her life when she got part in her first Broadway show. It did not feel the way she thought it would feel. It started to feel like a job to her. There was this whole part of her that she was not able to showcase in that career. She felt like she put in a lot of her energy, time and passion in her acting career but the results were not always favorable. Luck also played its role and Jeannine was not able to land herself a job for various plays despite performing well in the auditions. A lot of her experiences intrinsically and extrinsically did not line up with what she hoped for herself and she started to realize acting was not something she was meant to do for the rest of her life.
When did coaching come under your radar?
She came across coaching after watching a few videos of Tony Robbins. Someone recommend her to watch a few of Tony Robbins videos to deal with stress and improve her confidence as a performer. Jeannine thinks some of Tony Robbins work and practices do not work for her anymore as they are more aligned with the opposite gender. She has learnt to honor the meaning of being a woman. However, she still recalls how listening to Tony Robbins used to make her feel empowered.
What is your favorite coaching question?
She has a collection of these six specific questions that she asks from clients most of who are women. Most of these women are so driven and passionate of wanting to do more. The questions she asks are to acknowledge the hard work that her clients have put in at some point in their past. One of the questions she asks from her client is how they have changed in the process.
As a coach, how do you help people who are not sure what success means to them?
Jeannine usually asks the opposite of success and what it means to them if they are not able to figure what it means to be successful. Jeannine thinks ultimately it is our own choice to not know about things. When her clients are not able to share their views on a certain topic or what something means to them, it is indicative of the fact that they are not open or searching.
What have you been up to recently?
After that article came out in the New York Times, a lot of women approached Jeannine. They saw her and felt like she was relatable to them. A lot of women thought that if she could do what she was able to do in her life as a coach, they too could do it as well. Jeannine realized she had a gift to help other women achieve the same in their lives. Over the years she has helped a lot of women and men launch their coaching business. She still does this day in and day out. Jeannine has been running this coaching program for women for five years.
What is the best advice you have ever been given?
Jeannine says she is constantly seeking mentorship from different people and there are a lot of useful advice that she has received from them over the years. The best advice she has ever been given was from her grandmother who once said to her the following words
“Do not live life in the fast lane and do not live life in the slow lane”. Middle lane is the place to be. She did not get it back then, but what it actually meant was that one needs to be there in the middle ground and get to soak up the best of both worlds.
How can we connect with you?
You can find more about her work through her website. She shares coaching tools, techniques and self-care rituals on her website. Her website’s URL is
Practical and proven tips to improve communication and performance at work and in life. I remember when I first enrolled in coaching School at NYU. Each of us were asked to share why we were going to be a great coach. And I clearly remember one of my classmates feeling confident as he said I'm great at giving advice and then quickly became embarrassed when the facilitator responded. Coaches don't give advice. I'll never forget the shock we all experienced in that room because most of us in that room were the person that friends and family would come to when they needed advice. But there's a powerful reason why giving advice doesn't work.
Do you like being told what to do? Most people don't. In many cases when people tell us what to do we're not inspired to take action. So, how do we motivate others? How do we get people motivated to take inspired action?
The short answer is simple through asking questions and helping people think through things on their own. Scientists have discovered that our brain is a connection making machine and when we're able to think through things ourselves and we make a new insight there is a certain amount of energy that gets released when the brain connects a new neural pathway which provides the motivation to take action. Now, let me give you a practical example of this. Let's say someone does something "wrong" at work that you've asked them to do. Instead of telling them what they did wrong ask them, "What do you think is wrong here?" or "What do you think could be improved?" What information do you need to make it better?" Ask questions to help people think through things on their own.
Another way to help people think through things themselves is to invite them to repeat what you communicated in their own words. If you give someone else instructions to go to do a task and someone responds with "Ok I got it." Ask them, "What did you get? Can you repeat it to me in your own words?" This will help both you and the person understand. If you're on the same page and if they accurately understood what you committee communicated and it can save you a lot of time and energy.
Most people are so in their heads and it's very common for people to interpret information based on what they think you said and not what you actually said. I use this in my coaching as well. I invite people to explain a concept in their own words because I know it's helping them think and make new connections.
Let me share some practical neuroscience with you about how and why this works. This is taken from the book Quiet Leadership: Six Steps to Transforming Performance at Work by David Rock.
1.) To take any kind of committed action, people need to think through things for themselves;
2.) People experience a degree of inertia around thinking for themselves due to the energy required;
3.) The act of having an aha moment gives off the kind of energy needed for people to become motivated and willing to take action.
Knowing this is such a helpful communication tool based on how our brain works and I use this knowledge all the time I use it in my coaching. I use it in my life even when it comes in handy when I'm ordering something on the phone. Our job as leaders is to help people make their own connections instead of thinking for them. And here's the main takeaway if you help people become better thinkers they will become better performers.
Dr. Debi Silber, President and founder of www.PBTInstitute.com is a recognized health, mindset, empowerment and personal development expert. She’s a speaker, coach and author of the Amazon #1 Bestselling book: The Unshakable Woman: 4 Steps to Rebuilding Your Body, Mind and Life After a Life Crisis, The Unshakable Woman-The Workbook (the companion guide to the book) as well as 2 books recommended by Brian Tracy, Marshall Goldsmith, Jack Canfield and many more. Debi’s contributed to FOX, CBS, The Dr. Oz show, TEDx, The Huffington Post, Shape, Self, Health, Working Mother, Forbes, Psychology Today, WebMD, Ladies Home Journal, MSN, Woman’s World and Glamour to name a few. After researching and conducting a PhD study on how women experience betrayal from a family member or partner, Debi has discovered a predictable and proven process taking women from betrayal to breakthrough. That process, coupled with 27 years of health, mindset and personal development training and coaching, enabled her to create a multi-pronged approach to help women heal (physically, mentally, emotionally, psychologically and spiritually) from the trauma of betrayal.
Debi understands the demands of the busy woman because she’s one too. Managing The Silber Center for Personal Growth and Healing along with the PBT Institute™ on Long Island, teaching, speaking, coaching, mentoring and writing, she’s also married to her husband Adam for 27 years, is the proud mom of Dani, Dylan, Camryn and Cole (22, 21, 18 and 16) and is the proud mom of 6 dogs, Scooby, Nike, Roxy, Gigi, Kylie and Brody.
What was your first experience with betrayal?
Her first example with betrayal involved her family. Debi believes that if we do not learn from our mistakes, the universe conspires to put us in the same circumstances again. When the people we trust and are dependent upon break the rules, that is what betrayal is. Most of the times we do not see it coming and to us, it makes no sense at all.
How do you define betrayal?
It is the breaking of the spoken or unspoken rule that has been agreed upon over time. Betrayal has a lot of faces. Many people even feel like they have been betrayed by God. They feel like they will be kept safe and protected if they pray but it doesn’t happen for them and so they feel like a rule has been broken. Betrayal can be between friends, relationship partners, work partners, and the list goes on. It can always arise in situations or relations in which we put our trust and we agree upon certain rules but the outcome is different from what we expect.
How can someone transform and manage betrayal?
You should really build your ability to be resilient. That can help you manage betrayal. As far as transformation is concerned, it requires a whole lot of effort and work on our end.
Can you talk about your study in which you discovered a process through which you can take people from betrayal to breakthrough?
Debi found that with every participant the process became so obvious that it did not matter what the betrayal experience was. Debi found out that there were roughly five steps that participants had to go through if they wanted to put themselves on the path for recovery.
The first step is to focus on our spirituality and our emotions. The second step is to train ourselves to react properly and efficiently when we experience a betrayal. We need to learn to control our emotions because if we don’t we will eventually put our body into chaos as well. The link of our emotions to that of our physical health is very critical. The third step is to make sure we grab on to anything that can prevent us from falling in our emotional conundrum. The fourth stage is about finding and adjusting to a new normal. This is pretty much like when you move to a new house and you do not know your way around. However, you do realize you will get used to it soon. You know it does not feel like home but you are safe. You slowly enter into the fifth stage afterward. This involves healing and a new worldview. This is where the body starts to heal. You become more interested in self-care. The mind starts to heal as well. You are able to make better decisions as a result.
How did you feel when you discovered you had been betrayed by your husband?
Debi is grateful she has been able to heal from her betrayal. She has been able to build her family again and got back together with her husband who betrayed her. She had been with him for almost twenty years. Everything was great. It was only after that when Debi got extremely busy with her business and also had to look after her four kids. Her husband got
busy with his business. Debi started to feel as if her husband had transformed into a completely different person and soon discovered he cheated on her at some point in past. Debi confronted her on this issue and he did not deny it. In fact, her husband immediately told their kids about it as well. Eventually, Debi got back with her husband. During her time in separation, she transformed into a completely spiritual person. She wanted to turn her tragedy into something transformative, something that could also help others around her.
How can someone repent if they have betrayed someone?
The first thing you need to do is to accept responsibility for your actions and confront the person you betrayed. If you prefer to keep it as a secret, if you prefer to suppress the truth hoping somehow things will change, you are not helping anybody. There is no good you can do if you are not ready to reveal the truth to the person who was betrayed.
What is something you have practiced to make yourself more resilient?
Debi always confronts herself with her own truth. She lives in truth. She has become more resilient through meditation and journaling.
What is the best advice you have ever been given?
The best advice she has been given is to never stop no matter how hard the circumstances are.
How can we connect with you?
You can find more about her work through her website.
Her website’s URL is
You can also take an online quiz to find out if you are or have ever struggled with post-betrayal syndrome from the following link:
Steve Sakala is the co-founder and CEO of Mana Artisan Botanics. He has been a voice for sustainability, regenerative agriculture and medical cannabis for more than two decades. He was educated about the numerous benefits of the cannabis plant at a young age and quickly became passionate about its thousands of uses. As part of a growing movement of companies that want to create a better world, Mana Artisan Botanics is dedicated to crafting pure, chemical and pesticidefree, whole-plant botanicals. They are committed to empowering consumers with evidence-based data on the potential health benefits of phytocannabinoids and leading as a force for good in the rapidly growing cannabis industry.
Steve’s interest in cannabis stemmed from his interest in the environment and becoming an environmentalist. Shortly after high school, he felt that is what he wanted to do. He looked at all the environmental challenges we faced and felt the solutions to these challenges were rather simple to implement. Steve considered hemp an important part of these solutions. He was also interested in hemp because of its psychoactive properties. He worked on the first medical marijuana initiative way back in 1992. In the process of learning about hemp and its industrial uses as well as cannabis and its medicinal uses, he became devoted to getting the word out about the potential of cannabis on so many different levels. His major education has been on natural resources. His focus has always been on sustainable resources, renewable energy, green building materials etc.
Can you tell us about how health plays a role in your mission?
The fact that cannabis has a great potential to deal with health issues and major diseases is something that keeps Steve motivated. He has been in the industry for over 20 years and has worked with numerous medical professionals. Cannabis can help us in so many different ways. Cannabis can help cholesterol patients and blood pressure patients. It is extremely affective against inflammation and is also used to treat sleep disorders. Various studies have been conducted and results have shown that cannabis can also be used to treat diseases like Parkinson’s, Cancer and Alzheimer’s. Steve aims to educate people about the use of cannabis other than its usage as a medicine. He does a lot of education around nutrition.
Can you tell us a little about our endocannabinoid system?
Endocannabinoid system also known as ECS relates to the receptors in our body. ECS has more receptors in the body than any other receptors. Our body produces its own natural cannabinoids called endocannabinoids or endogenous cannabinoids. Our lifestyle has drastically changed in recent years. Due to the modern day toxins, the food we eat, the environment in which we breath and due to our day to day stress, we are not producing enough of our endogenous cannabinoids. Therefore, our indoor cannabinoid system is not playing its role to keep our health in balance. This is called chronic endocannabinoid deficiency. This is resulting in autoimmune and degenerative diseases among a lot of people. Through plants, mainly cannabis, we can try to fulfill the role that endogenous cannabinoids would have played.
Tell us a little about your garden.
After college, Steve left for Africa and spent four years in West Africa focusing on sustainable agriculture. Sustainable agriculture is the foundation of how we can build a sustainable society. Since college, Steve has been interested in growing food and growing medicine. It has become his life’s work. Steve moved to Hawaii about twelve years ago for some work and ended up buying a farm. He was able to grow some very diverse plants and raise animals on the farm as well. His agriculture philosophy is based on diversity. His farm consists of numerous fruit trees; he grows many medicinal plants as well. Steve also has a medicinal cannabis garden. He has been able to grow about 15 to 20 different types of cannabis in the garden.
How much time do you put into nurturing your garden?
Steve spends at least 5-10 hours a week on his cannabis garden. For his farm, he makes sure he spends about 30-40 hours a week.
Can you share someone’s experience of using your product?
There have been numerous people who have been able to undergo health transformation after using Steve’s products. These stories inspire Steve to carry on with his work. Most of these stories relate to sleep disorders of how people were able to treat their irregular sleep patterns through these products. Recently, Steve received feedback from a person who recently had a shoulder surgery and was in extreme pain. He used the cannabis products and was extremely surprised with the results. His pain went away in no time and was amazed with the results.
Can you tell us more about inflammation and how it affects the body?
There are so many health challenges that stem from chronic inflammation. Being able to reduce the amount of internal inflammation is key to being more aligned with how we want to be in our lives. It can help us reduce stress, irritation, pain and anxiety. Steve has extensively worked on his products to make sure they help in reducing inflammation.
What is passiflora?
It is the flower that grows on the passion vines and passion vines are known as passiflora. Passiflora has been used for hundreds of years for various different purposes. It is known to contain a compound that is very helpful for sleep. It can also help deal with anxiety. Steve has also built a product on top of passion flower.
Which one of your own product would you recommend for someone dealing with day to day anxiety or stress?
He recommends his most popular product called the ‘Hawaiian Turmeric Hemp Oil’. The reason it is so popular is because it does not taste like cannabis. Many of his clients do not want to feel like they are consuming cannabis.
What is the best advice you have ever been given?
The best advice that he has been given is to take care of himself. Steve says a lot of people have said this to him in his life. He believes that being a farmer and an entrepreneur, he tends to be work driven. Since he makes products that help people improve their health, Steve realizes that a lot of people are depending on these products. This gives him a greater sense of responsibility and at times he puts himself in a space where he is not able to take good care of himself.
How can we connect with you?
You can find more about Steve’s work and his products through his website. His website’s URL is
You can find more information about his Garden by visiting the following website:
Leora Edut is the creator of Goddess On The Go, where women connect, move their bodies, and uncover their bombshell beauty in a fun space designed to heal and create lasting fulfillment. Goddess On The Go events have been held internationally in Tulum, Mexico as well as in Hawaii, New York, Los Angeles and Detroit—and is expanding. She is the author of her recent book Goddess On The Go: Rituals To Help You Slow Down and Slay. Her work has been featured in: Elle Magazine, Lucky Magazine, The LA Times, and several others. She has spoken on stage with Marianne Williamson, been an expert on The Dr. Oz Show, and featured in the NY Post. In this episode, we talk about her journey to publishing her first book, her struggles with unhealthy relationships, doing transformational inner work, how she went from being a makeup artist to a lightworker and so much more.
Why do you think you had such a strong passion to publish your book?
Leora felt the story she was writing in her book was very important to get out to the public. It was a story of overcoming traumas, overcoming physical and mental abuse, the story of overcoming issues with alcohol. There were so many life experiences Leora wanted to share with other women because she believes a lot of women undergo the same experiences in their lives.
What was one of your darkest moment that you have shared in the book?
Leora talks about her very first relationship in the book when she was only fifteen years old. She found herself in an abusive relationship for almost a year. This person threatened Leora to commit suicide if she would leave him. He used to stalk Leora, insult her verbally and abuse Leora physically.
Why do you think you got into such a toxic relationship?
Leora believes it was mostly because of her traumatic and abusive childhood. She wanted to get away for it as she grew up in an abusive household. Her father was an alcoholic. Her father was taken away by police after Leora lodged a complaint for his actions. Leora recalls child abuse incidents from her childhood when she was as young as four years old. Her father had to be put into anger management sessions afterward and he started doing a lot of transformational work. As a result, her relationship with her father has improved drastically in recent years.
How much of an impact the events from your childhood have had on your personality?
Initially, it was difficult for Leora to process all the events from her childhood. She believes she wasn’t connecting with the pain and so she tried to suppress the pain mainly through drugs and alcohol. She says when she started doing landmarks, it opened the doors for every kind of other transformation she could think of. It has been a long journey for Leora but she has been able to process the traumatic events from her childhood. Laura believes these events helped her to shape herself as someone who could help young girls and women who have been a subject to abuse. It has helped her to relate to the pain of people around her.
Do you believe that you find purpose in pain?
Leora completely believes in it. Although, she does believe that sometimes when we are in pain, we may not be able to find purpose in it. A lot of times we may even think we are victims of our own circumstances but there can always be a purpose to look for in hard times.
Can you describe what a Landmark is?
It is a weekend workshop and it is super intensive. You sit down and you look at every single area of your life. The landmark consists of different exercises. They involve mediations, visualizations and part of it is making peace with parts of your life you are still holding on to. Landmarks teach you a lot about forgiveness.
What are some big insights you have had from Landmark?
The first insight she gained from the landmark was to let go off the shame that her past had nothing to do with her present. The second thing she learnt was to forgive her father for his past actions. Leora felt she had the choice to either stay angry and bitter or move on in her life.
What do you wish you could have told your four-year-old self?
She wishes she could have told her younger-self that she was going to be fine regardless of the circumstances, that she does not need to dim her life for someone else.
What is your favorite ritual?
Leora has two rituals that she really considers her favorite. One is taking a bath by candlelight along with rose petals, music and wine. The other ritual involves workout in which Leora performs yoga and Pilates.
What is the best advice you have ever been given?
“You can do the easy things and have a hard life or do the hard things and have an easy life.”
How can we connect with you?
You can find more about her through her website. Her website’s URL is
You can read the first chapter of her book for free from her website.
Agnes Kowalski was born into deep poverty consciousness and struggled to feel like she deserved a deep amount of love, money, recognition and even respect —which why she spent her life chasing.
Agnes went on a path of absolute persistence to heal this through every possible healing modality, becoming a self-help junkie along the way and eventually becoming a psychotherapist too. But she still wasn’t “cured”.
She could never seem to break through these limits she had around how much love and money she was able to attract, keep or hold on to. Then she found mindset.
Agnes immersed herself and became a student of mindset work and subconscious programming, which is when things actually started to shift her reality in a consistent way, it was the missing piece to actualizing the life she wanted: more money, dream clients, healing in all of my relationships, miracles and opportunities that she fantasized about. And she created it all with mindset. Now Agnes is a mindset and manifestation mentor and she wants to show YOU how to get more money, love, & attraction.
Can you talk about how you work in removing and overcoming natural survival mechanism to pursue an endeavor?
There are not a lot of examples of people living creatively who have an extreme amount of resources and money at their disposal. First, we need to normalize it for our brain and find people who are living their lives creatively yet they are able to earn profits from what they do.
How do you help people who have a job and they want to transition to doing their own business or into some new field but cannot afford to absorb a financial hit?
Agnes has had a lot of clients who transitioned from the corporate world to healing arts, online business or creative pursuits such as writing, producing films etc. Agnes thinks the best way for success is to take small steps gradually towards your success. You need to break down the limiting beliefs. If you believe you cannot make money in a certain field, try to break it down to its reasons as to why you have that belief in first place. A lot of things we hold onto are just sub-conscious thoughts, far-fetched from reality.
What advice would you have for someone building up their own product?
Agnes thinks she was able to come up with a product very quickly in her business. She was happy with the content but was not satisfied with the quality. Her mindset at that time was just to get rid of the anxiety of doing it and fix the product later. Agnes thinks a wealth-conscious way of thinking is to work on the brand you are trying to create rather than a small MVP just to get you in the game. You need to have a long-term vision where you are not looking for a quick escape hatch out of your current life. This would be her advice to her former self.
How can we get a better insight into our subconscious mind?
Agnes thinks it is a little tricky to understand our subconscious mind. She finds it fascinating though and loves to explore it. She was a psychotherapist in private practice and she did not earn a lot of money through it. She was helping people in her practice, her clients were happy and new clients would come in, but still Agnes was not able to earn money. This was mainly because Agnes had blocks around figuring out why she could not make a great deal of money from what she loved doing. She even did a lot of advertisement for her business to increase her revenue but all in vain. She then started to investigate money, mindset and subconscious programming. Agnes had this limiting belief that stemmed from the fact that she grew up in poverty. Her parents were children of the war. Back when her parents were born, everything was about scarcity.
What were your parents doing for work?
Agnes’ dad was an engineer, her mother tried to have her own business. She was a botanist but did not have a career in it. She ended up working in a factory, helped them make a few of their recipes. That company is now a million-dollar muffin company. She tried to start her own company as well but failed. Agnes believes all of this was present in her sub-consciousness, her father not able to reach his full potential, her mother failing in her business. To know more about your subconscious mind requires a lot of investigation which takes time. This is exactly the kind of homework that a lot of people do not like to do.
How did you transition into making more money?
This transformation happened over a 5-year period where she was specifically focused on finding new ways to earn money online. Initially, it was gradual but towards the later years, her profits grew substantially. The only investment that Agnes really made was in mindset coaching. She knew it was only a mindset issue for her and to be successful in her venture, she needed to have better thoughts in her head. She also read a lot of books during this period. It was an identity shift and she needed people to see her in a different way.
What is the opposite of a victim mindset?
In terms of the archetypes, the opposite of the victim is actually the mother. It actually means you just have to take good care of yourself, just a like mother would do for her children. Often times, we see women mothering their partners because they are not mothering themselves. Victim mode is when an individual is affected by everything external.
Where would someone start if they think they do not have enough money or they are afraid that they do not have enough money?
One of the best books that Agnes recommend to people going through this phase is ‘Tapping Into Wealth: How Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) Can Help You Clear the Path to Making More Money’ by Margaret Lynch. It talks about the mind-body connection to money. One of the exercises that Agnes use all the time with her clients is to ask them to look at their bank accounts and reflect on how that makes them feel. You need to get honest with yourself if you are really happy with how you spend your time and how you earn money. The first step really is to break out of denial of things happening around you.
What is the best advice you have ever been given?
The best advice she has ever been given is to take things off the pedestal. What that means is that whatever it is you want, you should never undermine your own existence and your own happiness.
How can we connect with you?
Sarah Jenks is the mother to 3 rambunctious small humans. Life Coach, Emotional Eating Expert and Sacred Space Holder.c It’s so easy to lose ourselves in work, in motherhood, in our parents’ expectations, or our own outdated dreams. We’ve all had times when we’ve had to put our heads down – like when there’s a new baby or severe financial stress – when cutting off parts of ourselves is our only chance for survival. Sarah is here to guide you in coming back to life, not so you can be who you were before, but so you can take the broken pieces and create an even more incredible life and truly realize your fullest potential.
She founded Whole Woman, an online membership program for women seeking the answers to “Who am I? And why am I here?” — you can find out more about that at whole woman.me She also is the creator of Live More Weigh Less – the most popular Online Emotional Eating Program. Since 2009 her community of women seeking a more meaningful life has grown to almost 100K.
Why do you think so many people are waiting to live more? Why do you think we are conditioned to wait?
Sarah thinks many women have been indoctrinated with false facts in the culture they live in. The biggest of them is that women are told they will be happy if they are thin and that lie keeps a lot of women stuck in moving forward in their lives. It is a patriarchal tool to keep women quiet and to not speak or stand up for what they believe in. This is not based in truth because there are numerous other reasons to take care of your body rather than just to be thin to take care of it. To be thin as per the standards set by society is not possible for a lot of women and this keeps them from truly living their lives. Sarah’s work has taken an amazing trajectory, she started in the emotional eating area. One day she ate an entire bag of chocolate biscuits, only with 5 more remaining in the bag. She threw them in the trash but after some time fished them out of trash. She was twenty-five at that time. Sarah realized at that moment that it might be difficult for her to maintain a healthy diet for the rest of her life. Sarah realized that when she stopped obsessing over everything she ate and the way she looked, her life became boring. Soon she stopped craving for unhealthy food and it was a big transformation for her. Through this experience, she found spirituality and a whole new world opened for her.
How did you find spirituality?
She got an email from her friend when she was at the Institute for Integrative Nutrition to go to one of Gabriel Bernstein’s coaching program which was in her apartment. Sarah started to meditate after this session. Through these sessions, she started to learn about the priestess initiation path, divine feminine and the history of witches. It has been a great way for her to practice by not waiting on things.
How do you think you got to know yourself better?
Sarah started to figure out things she loved doing. She started to ask herself questions like what was fun for her. It’s a lot easier to start from the initial phase, to look out for things that make you happy and content. She started taking voice lessons again, she started going to dance classes. The second step for her was to look for actions or activities that she was doing in her life but were not aligned with her personality, her likes and dislikes. She realized she was being a performer in her work. She did a photo-shoot where she borrowed her friend’s convertible. She was trying to be someone she was not in reality. She used to believe if she would stop performing she would not succeed in her life. However, she realized that not being herself was a lot more painful than being broke.
How do you think being a mother changed you?
It changed her in ways she cannot even imagine. Motherhood has been hard and challenging for Sarah. Before becoming a mother, she had this belief system that all she really needed for happiness is a nice and caring husband, a house and a couple of kids. She used to think that when she would have kids she would want to retire and become a full-time mother. However, only after she became a mother, she felt quite the opposite of her beliefs. She felt guilty about it because she wanted to spend all the time with her children. This also helped her understand how she was different from her grandmother, her mother, a few of her friends and some other women that she admires. It has also forced her to be critical of how and with whom she spends her time.
How did motherhood affect your business?
It affected her a lot in her business. She tried to conduct her day to day business activities as usual after the birth of her son, but it was hard for her to manage her business and look after her son all at the same time. She would continuously transition from what she calls a ‘corporate Sarah’ to a ‘mother Sarah’ and vice versa.
Tell us about the story of how you found yourself your dream home.
It was almost two years ago when Sarah found herself in a place where she felt she would lose herself after having her kids. She did not want to be a hustler, but she did not want to be a full-time mom either. She couldn’t see a future for herself anymore and nothing excited her anymore. She worked with this woman named Katina Mercadante (http://www.katinamercadante.com). She did this exercise with her in which Sarah would tell her life story to her and they would together uncover what Katina called Sarah’s true core virtue. Sarah would then write down her plan in incredible detail of where she envisioned herself in the span of five years. Katina helped Sarah to reconnect with her true inner values. Sarah wrote this whole plan about what she wanted to do in her life in the coming years. She wrote about getting women together in person in New England to help them wake up the divine feminine. She wrote about this vision of women circling in big fields, dancing naked in the woods under the full moon. She wanted to build a yurt for herself in the woods. She wanted to have a stream running through her property. She had always imagined a long driveway with trees. Two weeks later, she found herself a farmhouse just outside of Boston. She looked it up online, she looked at the pictures and all of it matched exactly as Sarah had imagined. It was way over her budget though. Luckily the owner of the firm that was selling this property turned out to be Sarah’s high school therapist. She was the first person to help Sarah help her with body issues. One thing led to another and Sarah finally bought the house against the advice of all her family members which included her parents and grandparents.
How did you meet your husband?
They met in college in a history class. They were both very different persons back then. Sarah would do anything to please the people around her. She hosted all the parties. Her husband was a football player. They have both become very spiritual ever since.
What is your vision for women?
Her vision for women is to only think about who they are and to always think from that place. They should not feel the pressure to be someone different.
What is the best advice you have ever been given?
The best advice she has ever been given is from one of her mentor who said: “Sarah you are not the princess, you are the witch in the woods, you need to get comfortable with that.” This had a huge impact on how Sarah sees herself, on how she does her work. It took so much pressure off her as well.
How can we connect with you?
You can find more about Sarah’s work through the following website.
You can also visit her personal website through the following link.
Dave Sanderson is an inspirational survivor and speaker. His thoughts on leadership have made him an internationally sought-out speaker. When US Airways Flight 1549, or “The Miracle on the Hudson,” ditched into the Hudson River on January 15, 2009, Dave Sanderson knew he was exactly where he was supposed to be.
He was the last passenger off the back of the plane on that fateful day, he was largely responsible for the well-being and safety of others, risking his own life in frigid water to help other passengers off the plane.
Despite the hazards to himself, Sanderson thought only of helping others and emerged from the wreckage with a mission: to encourage others to do the right thing. He also is the author of Moments Matter: How One Defining Moment Can Create a Lifetime of Purpose. Dave has been featured on NBC, ABC, PBS, and many other media outlets.
Take us back to that day when your plane crashed, what was that day like?
Dave has never been afraid of flying in a plane. In fact, Dave is a frequent flyer who has traveled in different airlines in different parts of the world. Dave wasn’t supposed to be on that flight, he was scheduled for another flight. Within a minute after the plane took off, Dave heard an explosion. He looked out the window when he heard the explosion which came out of the engines of the aircraft. They were flying over the George Washington bridge, only about 400 feet above it. They were roughly a 1000 feet above sea level. As the plane started to plummet towards the Hudson river, at that moment Dave felt as if he would not live to see another day. Dave was the last passenger to be rescued safely from the plane. He helped several passengers before exiting the plane.
What was the moment when you realized you were alive?
When Dave got out of the plane, he swam towards a ferry after which he went to a hospital. When the EMT took Dave’s blood pressure and it was unusually high, that is when he realized he was alive since he had blood pressure.
How did your life change after this traumatic incident?
Dave was back to work just a week after the incident. He took a flight the very next day to go back to his home and within a week took another flight to Michigan for business related work. Dave was going to Michigan for a corporate business trip. He was supposed to travel with Delta airlines. Dave recalls it was the toughest flight of his life. Just after recognizing himself as a hero in US Airways, no one really realized who Dave was when he got on the flight. Dave was also getting a lot of attention from media as well. The weeks following the incident were extremely hectic for Dave and he feels he should have stepped back a little and spend time with his family.
How many times have you flown since that incident?
On average, Dave flies for over a hundred times in a year. It has been nine years since that incident and Dave thinks he has flown almost a 1000 times after that incident.
How has this incident changed you as a person?
Dave feels this incident changed him in a lot of different ways. It has helped him to prioritize his time. Dave used to schedule all of his time around his business. Dave has started to spend more time with his family. He was able to change his relationship with his family after this incidence.
Do you think your life would have been different if you had missed out on that flight?
Dave truly believes he would have lived a completely different life had he not been on that flight. He thinks he would still be working for the company he was working for at the time of crash, he wouldn’t own his own company. He thinks the biggest difference would have been in his relationship with his family. Dave started to spend a lot of time with his wife and kids after the crash. Dave thinks God put him on that plane for a reason and for a purpose.
You mention you create meaning out of things, what was the meaning you extracted out of this tragic event?
He has been asked this question in many TV interviews. Dave thinks if the event didn’t happen, he can not even count the relationships he would have lost due to his previous lifestyle and his workaholic nature. He thinks he might have even lost his marriage and as a result would not have been able to spend time with his children. Dave considers it as a blessing in disguise because it allowed him to bring about a shift in his perspective of various things. Dave got to talk to a lot of other people who were on the same plane as him and they considered it a tragedy.
Where were you in terms of your speaking career before the incident?
Dave spoke all the time in his job but he was presenting all the time. Dave was around great speakers. He always wanted to speak but he always thought he had no content. The first time he was asked to speak publicly was in a local church. That is when he picked up the art of speaking publicly. During one of his speeches, a woman approached him and said she did not believe in God, did not believe in miracles but Dave’s survival story had her believe in God and miracles again. That is when Dave realized he had already impacted someone’s life through his speaking.
What is the best advice you have ever been given?
The best advice he has ever been given is to be humble in life. Even if you are good at your work, you should not get too cocky because there will always be someone who would be better than you.
How can we connect with you?
You can find more about Dave and his public speaking through the following website.
Katie taught herself, and now teaches others how to live in the darkness and plug back into the light. For a long time, she lost her joy, her happiness, and the LIGHT-ness of life. Through her own experience of learning how to GLOW in the dark, she knows that if you have the right tools, and get some solid support to help you along the way, you can live, love and thrive, in any circumstance. Katie is also the co-creator of Inner Glow Circle (IGC), an ICF accredited coach training and personal branding company for women. Their mission is to provide an inclusive educational edge to women who want to start their own coaching business.
What does profit with purpose mean to you?
Money is the main resource that we tend to talk about, worry about and stress about. There are so many other resources that we can focus on. Katie has come across a new idea called ‘melts model of resources’. The idea is to not look at our resources separately, they all melt together. We hear people complain about being broke and sometimes it's about money but sometimes money is not the issue. ‘MELTS’ stands for money, energy, love, time and space. When we separate these things out, we may have one of these things in excess but we will not be completely fulfilled in our lives. We may be profitable when it comes to money but we would be naturally in debt when it comes to love or energy or space when we separate these things out. Many of us only focus on the money part whenever trying to achieve profits.
You talk about dealing with depression in your past. What reasons contributed to depression and anxiety in your past?
There was a phase in Katie’s life when she was dealing with chronic illness. She went undiagnosed of Lyme disease for almost ten years. After diagnosis, she underwent rigorous treatment for almost three years. The treatment of this disease is rather complicated and one can easily get into depression due to the medication used for the treatment of this disease. It was also during this time that her brother overdosed and passed away. It was a big struggle for Katie and her family. She also went through a bad breakup. She was caught up in a toxic relationship with her fiancé. There was a lot of trauma and grief in Katie’s life at that moment. Trauma and grief suck the energy out of an individual. She has fully recovered from Lyme and it has been a complete year now. Her brother passed away three years ago, she called it off with her fiancé two and a half years ago. Katie has made peace with her past and moved on in her life.
Tell us about your company?
Katie’s company is called ‘Inner Glow Circle’. It is an all-inclusive mastermind and mentorship experience for women from different walks of life. Her clients are female entrepreneurs, working moms who are seeking excellence in their professional and personal lives. Katie aims to create a life for her clients that glow from the inside out.
How did you transition from owning a tanning salon to becoming a life coach?
Katie’s first business revolved around the tanning business. She had women come over to her salon and start discussing their problems. Some of them would start crying during the appointment. Katie developed an ability to be naturally open to people willing to share their vulnerabilities with her. Women would come to her salon with problems to share and issues to discuss. They would leave with hope and inspiration. Katie started to think about getting herself trained around giving advice to people with vulnerabilities in a professional manner. She started to explore a couple of different programs. Initially, she wanted to go into the nutrition business because she has always been an advocate of healthy eating. She started her masters in nutrition but dropped out of the program. She started to train as a coach after dropping out of her master’s program. She felt she could make a bigger difference in the lives of people around her if she became a coach. She launched her practice while she was still training as a coach.
How did you start your coach training program?
She started this program when she started Inner Glow Circle. She started her spray tanning company in 2012 and by the end of the same year, she had started coaching informally. That is when she developed and started her coach training program. She really went into full practice and established herself in the following years. She was quickly able to turn her investment into profits.
What are some of your favorite self-care practices?
Katie is a big fan of using Epsom salt in her baths. It is good for muscles and detoxing. She also makes sure to do some sort of exercise on daily basis.
What is the best advice you have ever been given?
The best advice she has ever been given is from her dad. He once said to her that 'The best way to fail is to give up." Katie always tell the women she works with to never give up, stay in the game and keep playing.
How can we connect with you?
Karen Frazier is the author of books about metaphysics, crystal healing, energy healing, dream interpretation, and nutrition. As a professional writer, she has written and published over 14 books. She has extensively studied alternative healing, Reiki, hypnotherapy, crystal healing, Feng Shui, dream interpretation, and more.
What was the beginning of your career?
Karen used to write as a little kid. She recently found out some of her poems she had written when she was only seven years old. She has always tried to add writing as a part of her job. She worked as a personal trainer and she turned her job into writing by writing a personal trainer manual. She worked as a patient outreach person in a national health clinic and she turned it into a writing job. During the 2008 recession, she was working as a marketing communication specialist which is actually a marketing writer. The writers were the first to be affected during the recession. Karen saw this as an opportunity to explore herself further as a writer.
Do you think good writing comes naturally?
Karen thinks that an individual can learn to write reasonably well. However, to write in a way that your writing touches people is something that comes naturally.
What is your favorite book that you have written?
She likes her first book about crystals titled ‘Crystals for Healing’ the most. It is the first book in which she talked about energy healing for the first time and she is very passionate and interested in energy healing.
Can you tell us a little bit about the healing powers of crystals?
As a kid, Karen loved collecting rocks. She kept a box of different rocks in her basement. She has always been drawn to rocks. She considers crystals ‘love letters’ from the earth. They have this beautiful earth energy and they have a vibration on their own. When you put something that vibrates at one rate next to something that vibrates at a different rate, the two move into the phase and vibrates more closely together. Pendants and lockets consisting of crystals can be worn to fully utilize the healing power of crystals. If you are low on energy, your vibration will raise to your vibration and you will lock into phase.
What kind of crystals can be used for profit and purpose?
For profit, Karen suggests using green crystals. They are the color of money. The best crystal that can be used for prosperity is called citrine crystal. Karen recommends to place it in the south-east corner of the home or in the cash box or in a wallet. For purpose, any crystal that is a sixth or seventh chakra crystal is good for purpose. Sunstone is good for creativity.
You practice Reiki, can you tell the listeners what exactly Reiki is?
Reiki is a form of hands-on energy healing. It originated in Japan. The way it works is that you place your hands on the person you want to transfer energy to. You can also heal people from distance as well. You can send healing energy to people who are lacking in it. Reiki is a practice in which someone can draw in the energy from someone who is attuned to the energy.
What does being attuned to Reiki mean?
If you want to practice Reiki, you have to go to a class and get yourself aligned with the energy by someone who is already attuned to that energy. This is done through a series of rituals.
Do you think energy is a feeling?
It can be a feeling. Although you don’t have to define it in terms of feelings. Karen believes everything is energy and everything we do moves energy into some kind of an action or form. Our thoughts and the actions we do, as a result, all creative energy. If we direct the energy, then we are likely to get things in our lives that fulfill us.
What is an intention you had that come to its fulfillment?
About nineteen years ago, Karen was in a bad marriage, had a three-year-old son and worked at a job she did not like. Every night she would sit down and write about her feelings and her intentions. She used to write about her good health and to have a job that would fulfill her creatively. She used to write about being in a fulfilling relationship. She used to visualize all of it every night. She did it for almost two months. Within a few years, she was able to get all of these things she used to write about. She got remarried, was in a healthy relationship. She had found herself a new job where she could afford to write from the comfort of her home.
What is an intention you had that did not come to its fruition?
Karen’s body is often her teacher and it reminds her to love herself more. Karen suffers from Celiac disease which means she cannot eat some of the commonly known eatable items like bread. About three years ago, she made an intention to try to get rid of this disease and eat bread. It did not work out for her. Karen says she is happy it did not work out for her because her intention should be to love her body and take in food only that is good for her body.
Do you always write down your intentions?
Karen still writes down her intentions but less frequently. She now visualizes her intentions in meditation now.
What advice would you give to someone who wants to write a book?
If you want to write a book, just sit down and do not censor yourself, just write. Just get everything on paper and then worry about organizing it and arranging it.
What is the best advice you have ever been given?
Her father used to say to her to have an open mind all the time. This, she thinks is the best advice she has ever been given. Later in her life, a friend named David said to her that she shouldn’t be so open-minded that her brains fall out.
How can we connect with you?
Jillian Turecki is interviewing podcast host, Anna Goldstein as the interviewee. Jillian has appeared as a guest previously on the podcast. In this podcast, Jillian and Anna talk about coaching and what it means to Anna.
What does being a coach mean to you?
For Anna, being a coach means of great value. She grew up around great coaches. She grew up as a tennis player. She had coaches in her life when she was as young as nine years old. They played a big role in her life from the very beginning. Being a tennis player helped her avoid trouble. It kept her focused. She got into coaching by being a tennis coach which was her first job. She has had the relationship with the word coach from a very long time. She started her company 10 years ago and back then, coaching was completely different from what it is now. Coaching back then was mostly associated with sports. The meaning of it has now changed. Anna doesn’t view herself as somebody who would have all the answers for your problems, but she would try to bring out the best in you, to equip you with tools that would help you perform at your optimal level.
What is the most useful or profound advice you received from your coaches?
She learned a lot about how to deal with loss. Since tennis is an individual sport, when you lose its all on you and when you win, you get all the credit. She would take losing really very hard. She was trained by her coaches to not give up and train harder after a loss. The ability to recover from a loss is something she also integrates into her personal development programs. She also learned about the importance of fundamentals from her coaches.
Whenever we are trying to learn something new, we can get a bit fancy and focus more on advanced topics to learn. However, we should keep revisiting the basics because we can only work in advanced areas if we have solid foundations regardless of the skill or sport we are trying to learn.
How has returning to the fundamentals helped you as an entrepreneur and as a businesswoman?
She got lost after her first job as a tennis coach in New York City. Within 2 years, she got burnt off. She used to work seven days in a week, was available all the time. She jumped from job to job, apartment to apartment and relationship to relationship. That is when she returned to the fundamental of tennis that she had learned all along from her coaches. She used to put herself in a positive state like listen to music or jump a rope before playing tennis. She had a proper diet routine when she used to train for tennis and realized that during her burnout phase, she was not on a proper diet. When her life was out of order, her food was out of order.
You mention that you underwent depression in your past? Why were you depressed and how did you cope with it?
Anna was hard on herself. Her self-talk was demotivating and she was mean to herself. She used to tell herself that she would never be successful in her life, that she was overweight and there was something wrong with her. She always carried along this thought with herself that she was depressed. She wasn’t connected to herself. This is why she is so committed to different spiritual practices because it helps her connect to her inner-self. Meditation helped her a great deal to cope with depression and anxiety. She also hired herself a coach to help her life her life to its full potential.
Is it true that people who get into life coach business need to had to have some sort of experience with difficulties in order to help others?
Anyone who is in this business had to overcome something in their past. People who choose the path to be healers are often people who have looked at it more closely. Coaching is actually a modernized therapy, a form of healing.
How do you think therapy and coaching can be integrated in practice?
If you have a mental condition, you need to hire yourself a therapist or a psychiatrist who can prescribe you medicine. Anna comes in contact with a lot of people who have been in therapy. It is great for developing awareness, learning about yourself. Coaching is about implementation and evolvement into letting go of old identities. Through therapy, you can identify the problem areas and through coaching, you can integrate action items in your life to resolve pain points. Anna herself has undergone therapy in past and also hired a life-coach for herself in her past.
Do you agree that happiness and joy can only come from inside?
Anna thinks it is the starting point for all your joy and happiness. If you do not have certain tools to understand your own mind, nothing that you achieve would be able to help you boost your self-esteem. Meditation helps you get familiar with your mind; every individual’s mind is different. People see reality in different ways. Meditation allows you to look at reality from different angles. Meditation can also help with love and kindness, forgiveness and peace.
PEACE OF MIND: HOW TO STOP OVERTHINKING AND GET CLEAR
Dr. Lindsay Padilla is a teaching + learning consultant. As an owner of many degrees, her experience as a sociology professor, and teaching adult learners online —She’s honored to pass on what she’s learned to trailblazing entrepreneurs who want to create digital courses. She now specializes in translating 1:1 client work experiences into signature courses, group programs + membership sites, as well as mapping out instructional content.
How did you get into academia?
She always knew she wanted to be a teacher. She kept following that path growing up. She worked up towards becoming a high school teacher. She started her teaching career by teaching eight graders while her friends were still partying in college. She got her first sociology class because her mentor gave this one class to her. She fell in love with sociology and realized the potential of sociology at a high school level. She decided to get a master’s degree in sociology. That put her on the path of graduate school. In her graduate program for sociology, she had a course called ‘Teaching Sociology’. It is very rare to have a teaching course in a grad school.
Do you think our educational system can be limiting and we do not always need a college degree to something valuable in our lives?
Lindsay thinks it’s a very complicated matter. As a sociologist, Lindsay gets to study about society, people, institutions and large mainstream patterns of our culture, their origin and how they impact us. The labor market is tied to the school system. She believes we have been stuck in very traditional ways of delivering education. We live in a credential society, which demands a degree to get certain jobs and unlock certain things in life. This is what we are told and this is what is only partially true.
What made you transition out of academia and into entrepreneurship?
Lindsay recently started a podcast in January called Academics mean business. She has been an entrepreneur for almost two years now. Two years ago in summers, she was getting paid by clients for helping them create courses. She has been teaching online for the past six to seven years. She was always the professor on campus who was known for conducting online meetings with her students. She had a lot to share with entrepreneurs starting online programs around teaching and learning. She helped various clients with it. She saw the potential of transitioning from academia to entrepreneurship. Lindsay felt she could have a greater impact on people around her if she became an entrepreneur.
What do you think makes a good teacher?
Lindsay believes everyone is a teacher. Lindsay believes it is something very common among all human beings. We teach our children, pass knowledge on to our friends and family. Teaching is about an outcome. As a teacher, one needs to set by themselves certain goals that they can help an individual or a group of people achieve through their teachings. Good teaching comes from the inner self of the teacher. A teacher needs to be aligned with the knowledge he or she intends to share. Lindsay says there is a lot of impostor syndrome in the realm of online teaching. Many people doubt if the online courses and online teachers can actually help others and if their knowledge itself is self-sufficient. This prevents a lot of good teachers to put up their courses online. Good teaching comes from being your true self in communicating what you know. Many teachers try to build an authority around themselves and it drains out all the excitement from learning. A lot of research has been carried around this issue and the results indicate that teachers who try to undermine students are responsible for creating an environment which diminishes learning and the power of education as well. Good teaching comes from interaction with students, listening to them, working on the feedback received from students and doing it better the next time.
How do you make online learning experiential?
We have to work with the medium that is transporting the knowledge. Online interaction can never be like a face-to-face interaction. When it comes to online education and the incorporation of experiential learning, a big part of learning is to motivate students to try out various things themselves that they can learn from the course. We need to make sure we have the required information in our online courses that can help students take their first action step and explore further on the basis of things they can learn from our courses. We need to support them and guide them in this phase of experimentation.
What is the best advice you have ever been given?
“Done is better than perfect. Everyone is doing the best they can”.
It is more of a daily mantra for Lindsay. It helps her get going in her business and she knows the end result may not always be perfect but she needs to keep moving in her life, to strive for better outcomes no matter what. This also helps her to be compassionate with others because she believes people around her, in their limited capacity, try to do things in the best possible manner.
How can we connect with you?
Her website: http://www.lindsaympadilla.com
Karen Salmansohn is known for creating a new breed of highly graphic and feisty self-help books — like her best sellers How To Be Happy, Dammit, Prince Harming Syndrome, Instant Happy and The Bounce Back Book — self-help books that she describes as being for "people who would never be caught dead reading self-help books" She has sold over 1 million books. Her research-backed happiness tools have been featured on CNN, Oprah, Psychology Today, The Today Show, etc – and will empower you to live a live of love! Recently she launched an inspirational jewelry line on HSN.com. Her jewelry line is a combination of her passion for design and short inspirational sayings to pick you up. In this episode we talk about how she transitioned her career in advertising to becoming an author and entrepreneur, the value of doing things differently/thinking outside the traditional route, how to manage worrying and so much more.
How did you get into the jewelry business?
Karen says she is a writer who loves to design. Karen loves to play with words as she is a writer and she loves to merge words with design. Karen has worked in ad-agencies in past and she knows how only a few words can be made so powerful with a good and illustrative design. Karen says it was not that far of a leap from designing books that had short powerful word combination to designing jewelry which had short powerful word combination.
How did you get onto this path of writing books?
Karen says she started off as a funny writer who loved psychology. As a kid, Karen used to read magazines such as psychology today and mad magazine. She took a lot of jokes from these magazines and added in her books. Karen loves to add humor in her writings and always likes to laugh about life. It has been a part of her personality from a very long time. The first book that she wrote was not about self-help, it was actually a novel with a touch of humor. Karen says when she started righting self-help books, most of the books already published were not funny or humorous to read. Karen herself felt embarrassed whenever she read a self-help book. She did not want anyone to see her reading a self-help book. When she decided to write such a book, she felt it should be written in a way that someone caught reading it shouldn’t feel embarrassed. She wanted to purposefully write self-help that feels funny and entertaining. She noticed there was a gap in the market. It is also how she naturally writes.
How did you get started in writing self-help books?
Karen always loved psychology and philosophy. She loved playing with words and pictures. Karen’s major was in psychology and was a philosophy minor. She found herself a job in an advertising agency because she felt that is where she had to be. She thought she could merge psychology and her love for writing and design, all in her job. She felt it would be satisfying for her. However, Karen did not like this job and felt she was selling her soul. She felt she needed to write more. She started to write her first novel. Even after writing a bunch of novels and publishing them, Karen still found herself reading psychology and philosophy. It was still her guilty pleasure. It was always a part of her personality. One day she went to a buy a wedding gift for her friend. She wanted to get something special and unique. She came across this book titled ‘The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying’. She loved the design on the cover of the book and felt like giving it as a gift to her friend. However, she was not sure of giving the book to her friend before reading it herself. She got herself a copy and read the book. She was greatly moved after reading the book. She became so obsessed with it and would talk about it all the time. That is what got her to write her first self-help book titled ‘How to be Happy, Dammit’ which became an instant best-seller.
What stood out the most to you in that book?
It was a Buddhist book. Karen never came across a book in which so many aspects were put together in a coherent manner. It talked about Buddhism, psychology, and neuroscience in a concise and well-organized manner.
Did you face any initial rejections when you started to write books?
Her first published book was a novel. She sent the book out on a Friday with a beach towel and a bottle of suntan lotion to the publishers. She did it to stand out and told the editors the book would make good beach reading. She got an offer next Wednesday for this novel. To get a contract for her first novel, she really did not face rejections of any kind and was lucky enough to publish it without any major hindrance.
Can you give some tips on anxiety, depression and pursuing one’s dreams?
Karen writes a lot about anxiety. She wrote a book titled ‘The Bounce Back Book’ In which she talks about resiliency and how people can bounce back from tough times. She also launched a course on her new video learning site (https://mastersinlife.com) for the anxiety cure. She wrote the bounce book because she had gone through sexual assault. It was a very challenging time for Karen. She started to stress a lot after that incident and gained weight.
What action step would you suggest to someone wanting to turn their passion into a pay check?
Karen herself was in a job she did not like. She thinks we need to believe in ourselves. Find out how other people are doing the work that you do, see if there is something different you can do to turn your work into your passion. Karen also suggests one needs to have a concrete plan because following your passion without a plan can be a problem. Karen started to freelance when she had a job in advertising. She knew she wanted to write but also wanted to make sure money would not be a problem when she would start writing her novel.
What is the best advice you have ever been given?
The best advice she has been given has been passed down to generations in her family. Her grandmother used to say this to her mother who in turn would say the following words to Karen “If you keep doing what you are always doing, you will keep getting what you are always getting”. It simply means if you want different results in your life, you need to do something different.
How can we connect with you?
Chris Winfield is known as the "The Super Connector" and has worked with entrepreneurs, authors and people from many of the world’s best known companies, including Disney, Virgin, Macy’s, Viacom, Conde Nast, Intuit & NBC to help them get more publicity, make connections and give their messaging something I call, the 'Unfair Advantage Effect'. It's what happens when your 'Unique Position', plugs into a 'Mass Audience' and leverages 'Media Credibility'... these three qualities create your 'Unfair Advantage and turn you into a Trusted Authority in your market. Which only makes it easier and easier to work your way up the 'Power & Impact' food chain. Once the acceleration starts, the momentum just continues to multiply. Not only has he helped his private clients in my New York Agency, but he’s personally been featured in the Wall Street Journal, New York Times, NBC's Today Show, USA Today, Fast Company, Forbes, and hundreds of other media outlets. He’s the Editor-at-Large for Arianna Huffington's ThriveGlobal, a columnist for TIME, Business Insider, INC. and the host of a show for Entrepreneur Magazine.
Were you a shy kid growing up?
Chris was not shy at all. He had a lot of friends right from his childhood. He does a lot of work around networking and meeting people but he still has an anxiety or a feeling of not belonging to a particular group. Chris says his ultimate goal is to remove that anxiety and feeling of not belonging to a group within himself and from the people he works with.
Do you agree that anything new is a little bit anxiety provoking?
Chris truly believes that whenever human beings undergo something new or different, they are bound to experience anxiety. There is also a scientific explanation to that. The amygdala of our brain which is also called the lizard brain wants us to stay safe. It resists change and Chris feels that is where the anxiety comes from. However, he thinks it is completely natural to feel that way whenever we are about to do or experience something new. What really matters is what we do in response to this feeling of unease. How we respond to it and what action do we take to deal with our anxiety really matters.
What was your most recent breakdown breakthrough moment?
The most recent major event was about almost six years ago. This happened when a company that Chris had co-founded completely imploded. Every bad thing you can imagine seemed to happen back then. Chris says throughout his life he had been able to succeed in his professional life through building connections and networking with people. He started to think more in terms of himself rather than the people around him, even his family. He shares this incident when his company was almost near to its bankruptcy and inevitable closure. Chris recalls he was on an important call and back then every call seemed very important. Chris was so busy on the call that he even ignored his three-year-old daughter when she came to her asking for something to eat. Chris only realized this when he saw his daughter take something out of the refrigerator and prepare her meal on her own. Chris says he had been so much involved and occupied in this call that he even ignored the single most important person in his life; his daughter. He hung up the call, sat down and realized he had to change everything in his life. He did not know what that meant and how he could do it. It started off with some very small changes. One of the things he realized was that he had become very disconnected with people around him and very focused on what he could get.
Do you consider yourself a spiritual person? What does spirituality mean to you?
Chris definitely thinks he is a spiritual person. For him, spirituality means having a strong relationship with the higher power. For him, it is God. When he remembers God, he realizes he is not the one who is running everything and that is really comforting for him. A lot of times, we are not in control of a lot of things and to rely on some external omnipotent entity can be really soothing. He believes in free will and he believes that the better his actions would be, better would be the outcome. However, at the end of the day, it comes down to his relationship with God because Chris believes you cannot control the outcome of everything in your life.
What inspires you to improve your life and the life of others around you?
The feeling he gets when he is able to help someone realize the fuller idea of themselves or enabling them to see their full potential is a great source of inspiration for Chris. When Chris talks about connecting people, it means connecting them to other great people or to their full potential.
You have this coaching program in your business named ‘Unfair Advantage’, what is it about?
Unfair Advantage came from a small mastermind group that Chris was a part of. The group is called the ‘dad mastermind’ and it consists of famous entrepreneurs like Todd Herman, Jonathan Fields, Ryan Lee, and more. Chris attends this meeting every 45 days. It was in last March when the participants asked Chris to do what he does best. Chris had no idea what they were talking about. They said they describe Chris as their unfair advantage because he is always able to connect them with the right people for media, or partnerships or clients or a contractor, whatever they need it, he finds a way for them through his connections. Chris thought about it for a while and realized he had been doing this excessively for the past five years. In this program, Chris helps entrepreneurs get the right kind of publicity for their business. Through his vast connections and extremely good networking skills, Chris helps young entrepreneurs showcase their services and helps them publicize their businesses.
What do you do to be more open and resilient to challenges and difficulties?
Chris spends a lot of time on himself. He works one-on-one with an energy healer. He does a lot of journaling as well. He tries to take every advantage that he can take. Anything that he feels can be helpful for his self-improvement, Chris makes sure to make the most out of it.
What is the best advice you have ever been given?
The best advice that he has ever been given came from his mentor. He introduced Chris to gratitude. He asked Chris to text him three things Chris was grateful for every day. He once said to Chris “You have a responsibility to be a better person”. It is so unbelievably simple to follow this advice. Chris starts each day of his life to become a better version of himself by the end of the day. Chris says the easiest way to improve yourself is to help someone else become a better version of themselves. This would eventually help you become a better person.
How can we connect with you?
At the beginning of the year I set an intention that I wanted to learn how to sing and some of that was because I wanted to explore accessing my voice more getting in touch with speaking from my voice and really feeling the energy of my voice and hoping that Wanda will help me get over some of my fear of public speaking but also just released some blocks around really speaking my voice and in the beginning of the year I had somebody that was assisting me on getting me on podcasts. And so she had reached out to somebody for me to be interviewed on her podcast. And so then she interviewed me on her podcast her name is Ariane and she actually is a voice coach. So at the end of the podcast, I told her what my goal was and I hired her to become my voice coach so we would talk every about every week sometimes twice a month. We would do singing lessons and so we built this relationship and then I interviewed her on my podcast for episode number ninety one which was claiming your voice the power of your voice and in the podcast, she said something that stood out to me and she was talking about the Avatar course.
I became curious about it. I had heard her talk about it several times but then she said a couple of things on the interview that stood out to me. At the end of the interview, I asked her about the Avatar course -- in which she told me she would talk to me about the Avatar course and we set up a time to talk about it. I knew that I would benefit from this course but had a lot of resistance around going to the course. I mean leaving my family going by myself. I just felt resistant to it. But at the same time, I felt like this calling like I knew that it would help me. And I knew that it would bust through some of my blocks that I felt like I had been experiencing. And you know she told me that the course was July. At this time, it was the end of June and I thought "I can't make it happen that quickly." It was too much of a mind shift for me to just be like "Alright I'm going to leave." But then we talked about a couple of things. She said, "You know your evolvement will help your family will help your son." And that really resonated with me. So I said to my husband, "I need to go on this trip. It's these dates." He said, "Okay." I booked my trip and I was ready I was ready to go but I was still feeling a little fear and resistance around it.
Three weeks later I get on the plane fly out of Florida and I get there. It was different from any other personal development or self-development course I had ever been to. There were people from all over the world. It was very unfamiliar. There weren't a lot of people who were my age (I'm 37). So a lot of people were either older and there actually were kids there that were doing this work too. And I had really had no idea what to expect. So you know I signed up I got the books and I started doing the workbook. And then you get assigned to a one-on-one mentor. I didn't know I would get one-on-one attention like that.
Essentially what we did was we really dove into our blueprint what beliefs have we formed what ideas do we have about our identity the world our self and just through asking questions through the question in the workbook and through different exercises just exploring what comes out right. And it was really profound. I mean the number of breakthroughs I had.
I don't think I've ever had that many breakthroughs in my life so much so that I started feeling unstable like I was feeling under rounded and they actually had to walk me through like a five-step process of getting more grounded through actually touching physical things like they had me pick up an object and hold it and describe what it felt like and then compare it to another object that I had picked up and describe what the difference between the two objects just so I could get more grounded and present in the room because once I kind of busted through my old belief system maybe feel really in balance and I guess I'll just tell you a little bit about a process that they took us through it I'm jumping way ahead to the work. But all breakthroughs begin with a breakthrough in belief. So it's like what beliefs are you operating from. And I consider myself somebody who's pretty introspective I guess. I do this work with clients so I ask myself these questions all the time and I could spew out my living beliefs pretty easily. Even the woman that was working with me was like wow this is this seems pretty easy for you. But the big difference for me was understanding the origin of the belief and I've done this before with clients and things like this but this was different because once we identified what a belief was we looked at it and we looked. Is this helpful or is this impeding? Now it is interesting because some beliefs like there is a belief I had that I'm fortunate. And while I thought that would be helpful I realized it was actually impeding. And the reason why is I was settling for things because I'd go Well I'm fortunate or at least I have this. And it was actually an impeding belief rather than a helpful belief. So if you can identify like okay like is this belief impeding or is this helpful. A lot of the beliefs we have.
They came from society our parents, teachers, maybe even the sports arena siblings culture religion and they were using the term in this course indoctrination meaning you didn't deliberately choose to have this belief this belief was kind of imposed on you in some way. So the next layer was to uncover. Was this something that was deliberate or was this indoctrinated. And so if we take my belief I'm fortunate I picked that up from someone along the way. It wasn't something that I think I intentionally chose. That's different from me but really choosing the belief. But I probably heard someone or somebody say along the way. Well, you should be lucky for what you have or you're very fortunate. And while that is true I was actually using it in a way that was impeding and therefore it wasn't deliberate. So the other piece is that if your attention is on these old beliefs or these beliefs that are impeding it robs some of your attention and if you don't have free attention then you don't have a choice. So a lot of the time we don't actually sit down and take out the trash that's in our mind. We just keep going. Imagine if you had a car and you never took it in the shop to get fixed. Like obviously that car wouldn't run well but also if you know were experiencing you know a bumpy path and you took it into the shop. The first thing one of the first things you would probably do is lift up the hood and a lot of time we don't investigate our beliefs or our thoughts or what the inner workings of our mind we just kind of keep going and we're not really taught this these skills in school and it's quite uncomfortable.
I mean I felt very uncomfortable because some of it is like it's surprising you don't even know what's going to come out sometime. But in the end it was so freeing. Afterward, I could literally feel a release and then I did feel like I had more free attention and then I can direct that attention towards what I want what I want to create. OK. So you might be thinking Anna all of this is great. You know some of it makes sense some of it might be a little bit confusing but like. Now what. What do I do? How can I identify what are some of these beliefs that are blocking me and part of my blueprint that isn't getting me the results that I want. And that's a great question because there is a process so essentially you know I used to think that that is true that your beliefs create your reality. But now I understand that it's an experience. Reality is an experience right. So like if you and I go to the same movie we each are going to have our own experience of that reality. So whatever your experience is is the reality that you're creating where does your experience come from? It doesn't come from the movie out there it comes from your own internal experience. So, if something is hard or let's say you're stuck in some area in your life whether it be health relationships your family a business your career. Look at that. The first question is what would I like to change?
So then you identify what you would like to change so if you have a moment I would say pause this and write down what is it that you would like to change. The next question is what belief might someone have in order to experience a let's say fear of talking to people that you don't know though if you have a moment pause this and write down the question and write down your answer the next question is how do you prove that this belief is true. So writing down like behaviors habits patterns tendencies that you do to prove this belief to be true. So I'm going to give you an example. This was an example taken from the workbook. It's called resurfacing techniques for exploring consciousness resurfacing by Harry Palmer.
So the guide asks, "What would you like to change?"
STUDENT: My fear of talking to people I don't know.
GUIDE: What belief might someone have in order to experience a fear of talking to people. He doesn't know.
STUDENT: People might say something bad.
GUIDE: How do you prove this belief to be true?
STUDENT I've got examples. I've seen it happen. I've done it.
(keep going until there is a breakthrough)
GUIDE: What other belief might someone have. In order to experience a fear of talking to people he doesn't know?
STUDENT: I might say something stupid.
GUIDE: How do you prove this belief is true?
STUDENT: I said something really stupid to my friend's wife.
GUIDE: What other belief might someone have in order to experience a fear of talking to people he doesn't know?
STUDENT: Don't talk to strangers. It's good advice for children. Aha. I just realized something. It's not because I don't know them that I don't talk to them it's because they don't know me. I'm the stranger. The belief is strangers are dangerous.
This is a beautiful process. That's the end of the process. But it doesn't always end there. But the idea is to keep asking the question about what belief might someone have in order to experience the fear. You can do this around comparison. You can do this around any area that you're stuck and then you want to ask yourself the question how do you prove that believed to be true and you keep going with it. Now I'm going to tell you another step that I've integrated on my own with this question is to almost all beliefs are motivated by three things they're either motivated by modeling someone like we saw somebody do it or we heard somebody do it. That was in our sphere most likely growing up that had an influence on us in some capacity. My mentor my mentor that was there told me a great story about this she said that when she was in her 20s she had this fear of birds and she couldn't figure out where it came from me you know and it was just like you know she was she had this fear of birds and she said and then one day she went back to her hometown.
She lived on her own at the time so she went back and visited her mother and she saw that her mother was afraid of birds and she realized oh that belief wasn't mine. It was my mom's and because she was able to understand that that belief wasn't hers. She could let it go. Another motivation behind forming beliefs is resistance so there's resistance behind some behavior. So let's say your mom was super unorganized and then you became like a neat freak. So you're kind of do the opposite or obedience like somebody said like you know you should grow up and get a 9 to 5 job and you just like follow the rules. So identifying where the motivation of that belief began. So that's a step that I've been adding to the equation it is part of the process but this is a really big process but I just wanted to give you a snapshot and share a little bit about some breakthroughs that I had with the intention of hoping that you can get use out of this and if you have any questions you can always reach out to me.
If you want to set up a complimentary coaching call to learn more about this process and how I can help you go to annagoldstein.com/coach
Jillian Turecki is a relationship expert, yoga teacher and public speaker who for 18 years, has been studying the art and science of fulfillment. Under the masterful guidance of Anthony Robbins, Jillian is certified by the Robbins Madanes Center for Strategic Intervention known for employing innovative strategic solutions to the most pervasive difficult problems. Fueled by an insatiable curiosity about what makes a relationship thrive, her mission is to help both singles and couples strengthen their relationship with themselves so that they ultimately transform their relationships with others. Jillian is expertly trained in working with the individual, couples, and families, and is sought out for her compassionate, direct, and very authentic style of coaching and teaching.
“Our entire experience of life boils down to relationship. From the intimacy we crave with a partner to the success we achieve through our work. None of it is possible without understanding our own psychology and the psychology of those we relate to. We never learned this at school, but it is learnable. To be able to communicate masterfully, that is, to transcend our insecurities, hurt and reactivity is a skill essential to our personal fulfillment.”
What do you think is most important in a relationship?
If we talk about an intimate relationship, there are a lot of things that are very important to maintain a healthy relationship. The most important part would be respected. It is very difficult to be in a relationship if you do not have respect for yourself. If you do not respect your partner in a relationship, it is impossible to have any sort of intimacy.
What do you have to say about self-respect? How can someone disrespect themselves?
Self-respect is about honoring where you are and also giving yourself a little push to move forward and grow. Self-respect starts by respecting yourself first. Many times we start disrespecting ourselves through our thoughts that we have about ourselves and doubts e have about ourselves. Most of us indulge in destructive self-talks, addictions or bad habits which actually implies disrespecting ourselves. Every individual needs to decide what self-respect means to them since these standards can vary from person to person. For some people, self-respect might mean saying no to more things and for others, it might mean saying yes to more things. It all depends on how you are living your life and what you need.
How closely do you think respect is to settle down in a relationship?
It varies from person to person. You should always ask yourself what respect means to you and share it with your partner. You have to share that with yourself. Jillian thinks it is very important that people have an honest conversation with themselves when they are disrespected by their partner and share it with their partners. If you feel perpetually disrespected, you need to look deep into it. Make sure you stand up for yourself and make sure to show the other person to respect you as an individual. It is very important to have a conversation with your partner about self-respect if you feel disrespected in a relationship.
How can someone build their self-esteem again if they have been in a toxic relationship in past?
If you have low self-esteem regardless of the fact that you are in a relationship or single, you need to work your self-esteem very quickly. It is very difficult to build any sort of intimacy in a relationship if you have low self-esteem. If you are single and you are searching for a partner thinking in the back of your mind that this person would help you boost your self-esteem, that is probably the biggest mistake you can ever commit. People around you can only help you grow, but it is down to you to improve your self-esteem. The fastest way to improve your self-esteem is to commit yourself to grow and to do things that make you feel alive.
How can we improve our communication in relationships?
All the rules that apply to real-world communication cannot be applied in a relationship. Communication rules in relationships are totally different. Jillian shares three ways to improve your communication to the next level in a relationship. They are the following:
If you are in an intimate relationship with someone, that person is definitely aware of your energy even if they do not think in terms of energy and cannot put it in words. Human beings can naturally feel other people’s joy and stress.
Can you talk a little about emotional fitness and how we can integrate it in relationships?
Emotional fitness is definitely not about not feeling your emotions. If you have a habit of stuffing your emotions, then you are emotionally not fit. Emotions do two things; they either move through us or get stuck in us somewhere in our bodies. All of us have some emotions that are stuck in us. Emotional fitness is not about being perfect rather it's about self-awareness. You have to be super-aware, you have to take action and you have to have insight in yourself.
There are two action steps that can be taken to become aware of yourself. It takes a little bit more effort on the inside and it involves writing down what makes you come alive, what makes you happy or excites you. Commit yourself to make space for that action or habit that gives you the freedom to explore yourself and gives you joy. The second thing that can be done to become emotionally fit is to begin your day by doing something that can help you reduce stress. You have to prepare yourself to deal with stress. Stress is more about how you respond to it and how you integrate it in your body.
What is the best advice you have ever been given?
The best advice she has been given was from her mom who often used to say to her to “pull up her socks” when Jillian was struggling through her life. It was more like a metaphor which meant to get her head together and move forward.
How can we connect with you?
You can connect with her through her website. Her website’s URL is
Jillian is planning to start a membership program for people who want to gain emotional fitness and deal with stress in way that does not effect their mental and emotional fitness. You can find more about the program through her website.
You can also follow her on Instagram through the following URL
Jillian recently launched Emotional Fitness Monthly, the first ever membership based plan 100% focused on teaching people just how to do this.
To learn more about how to join Emotional Fitness Monthly: http://www.jillianturecki.com/efm
Her newest course, “Grit and Grace: Rehab for the Broken Hearted” is for a limited group of women going through an intense breakup/divorce. To apply for a phone consult, please email at firstname.lastname@example.org
Where are you stuck? What’s holding you back?
We have all these reasons why we can’t do the things we can’t do what we want.
But what’s really holding us back is fear.
The number one thing that stops us is our fear. Now any time you're feeling stuck you can ask yourself What am I afraid of?
And you can keep asking yourself this question.
And when I ask clients this questions it usually boils down to fear of failure and if we fail that we won’t be loved...
I hear… I’m afraid of failing or being rejected (Which in some form is failing).. so we’re going to lump rejection into a form of failure…
And we’re afraid if we fail ….that it means were not good enough…and if we’re not good enough…we won’t be loved.
Fundamentally this is the thing that we all are afraid of. Every single human being has fear and experiences fear often. But how you manage it is what makes the difference in the results you create. Its what separates those who are being bold — taking action — and intentionally designing their life… from those who are living by default… making all types of decisions and choices from a place of what if it doesn’t work out…what if i fail.
So, if you're wondering why am I not doing that thing that I want to do… I know what I want to do but I”m not doing it… I know i want a new job but i’m not applying.. i know i want to be in a relationship but i’m not putting myself out there… i know i want my own business but i’m not starting it… i know i want these amazing clients but i’m not promoting myself…
If you want to know why your not doing something — why your stuck — it’s because there is some conscious or subconscious fear — …looking stupid..not being perfect…not getting the love or the approval we desire.
When I've asked clients what does it mean if you fail? There might be some type of loss…loss in money, loss in identity, loss in relationship…
But most of the time… if we simplify it — it means something didn’t work out the way we want it to.. or expected it to or imagined it would.
Let me say that again.. something didn’t work out the way you wanted it to or expected it to or imagined it.
DOES THAT MEAN YOU FAILED? ABSOLUTELY NOT. And this is where most people stop, quit or give up.
They try something — it doesn’t work out… and they say they failed… and they quit! AH.
Failure could be trying and it not working out or failure could be not trying right.
So let's just try to do stuff and if it doesn't work out you know if it doesn't work out right away like try again and try again the first time you walked you didn't stand up and just start walking. You fell down you stood up again fell down you stood up again. Right. This is part of the process right of. You expect it.
Expect some failure. Expect some rejection. And don't give it any meaning about you that there's something wrong with you or that you're not good enough.
We're just we're just kind of self-loathing and creating this storyline of how limited we are — we we’re not… if something doesn't work how does it mean that there was something wrong or we're not enough. Right? Just follow the logic.
We really need to investigate how or mind are working - and just see… how we are holding ourselves back.. instead of growing into embracing imperfections, stumbling along the way, and becoming more resilient, more confident, more interesting, more brave, and courageous.
Take those steps — send that email, make that phone call… in fact… i want to invite you to expect failure… don’t be so afraid of it… make friend with it… we have become so sensitive… you can handle if someone says NO to you…believe me.. you can handle it… LEARN
If you are learning… you are WINNING.
See how that lands if you say “I failed” versus “this didn't work out.” It's a lot more gentle. And within that space of something not working out we can expand on that and ask what didn't work out? what can we do differently next time? and then we can then we can really access the learning opportunity. Right.
But if we use these really big overgeneralized words of failure or rejection. And when we use these really harsh words like I'm a failure or we begin to strengthen this idea or belief about ourselves that we’re not good enough and we actually want to go in a different direction we actually want to want to start to cultivate an understanding that we already are enough. We want to strengthen our potential of possibility …and what’s possible for us… to consciously create and design a life we love!