Today I have a very special guest. She is the author of multiple books including The Gift of Adult ADD. I read this book initially about seven years ago after it was recommended by a therapist because I was struggling with ADD and it was one of those books you read and say “she’s talking about me”. It had a profound impact on my view of myself and how I was approaching my life.
Flexible thinking means there can be pitfalls but there are also gifts. This is something we can use in every area of our life even if it’s not ADHD in the sense of this is a challenge but how can I find some benefits to it? If I have a weakness how can I have some flexible thinking about that?
You can recognize your weaknesses and make some progress in improving them without being defined by them. Are you going to be defined by your weaknesses or by your strengths?
Symptoms of Adult ADD
Turning it into a gift
The number one choice you can make is to define yourself by what’s working and also to find a match. A child might get in trouble because he wants to talk all day and be active. What if that kid decided he wanted to be a physical therapist? A physical therapist moves all day and talks all day. So it’s about helping people to find the path for them and broaden their idea of the kinds of jobs that will match who they are.
The formula for success is to find that place where you are different from others. There are a lot of places where ADD fits well and you need to find those places.
Turn your mess into your message
If you’re trying to figure out where your contribution is to the world and you say “what the heck is wrong with me” that is the place you make the contribution. We think of a mess as something unsettling but you have to stop being afraid of being unsettled.
It’s so easy to spend our lives doing things that are worthless to ourselves. Those messes can be like a tracking method to find out where your heart is, where things will be easier and not harder for you. Once you identify that you can stay on track with that.
When you are a child your parents are 100% responsible for messing you up but you are 100% responsible for what comes next. A lot of kids need to hear that. They want to be validated and blame their parents and that’s fine. But even if that’s true what happens tomorrow is 100% your choice. You can do it on your own but psychotherapy or coaching are tools that change people’s lives. Small changes can make big differences over time.
Common misconceptions about ADD and ADHD
Connecting with Lara
Today’s guest is Vasavi Kumar. She is often described as your kick in the pants guide in route to your desired destination. She’s a licensed social worker, special education teacher and certified coach. Vasavi holds dual masters degrees in special education from Hofstra University and social work from Columbia University. She’s a pro at attracting media and works with her clients to create and go after opportunities that align with their brand values. She has been featured in the Wall Street Journal, is a regular on NBC’s Kansas City Live as the keeping it real guru and was on VH1’s basketball wives where she coached one of the main stars of the show. She truly believes that with impeccable character, work ethic and unwavering values you can do, be and have anything you want. In today’s episode we explore being bold and loving yourself.
Before Vasavi was bold and no BS she was very much not bold. She got to where she is today because it became intolerable at some point to be afraid to be bold. As she got older she started stepping into her own stuff, being who she wants to be and finding her own voice. Being fake and fluffy and having to manipulate her words in order for people to like her didn’t feel right anymore. She had to make a choice. Did she care more about being liked or did she care more about being herself and not having to juggle multiple personas?
Around the time Vasavi graduated from Columbia University in 2010 she found out about the coaching industry. She had been in therapy since the age of 12 and was going to school to become a therapist so she knew both sides. She loved the approach the coaching industry took to help people move forward in their lives. So right after graduating she signed up for a coaching certification program, became certified and within that year they encouraged them to start their own businesses. She started her business in August 2010 and since then has really immersed herself into what it means to run a business. You can listen to podcasts and read books but you have to start to implement what you have learned. Vasavi would sign up for stuff and immediately put it into action.
If you were to ask Vasavi why she cares and why she wants to do this the short answer would be because she can. She’s able to so why wouldn’t she? She’s able to give back in this way and to help others because she can, because she wants to and because she has to. She lives with a sense of urgency that she doesn’t want to die not having used all that she was given.
What’s the best advice you’ve ever been given?
In terms of business the first piece of advice is adopt an immigrant mentality which means do more than is expected of you. Don’t do bare minimum and half ass things. Have a higher standard for yourself and don’t settle for the mediocre.
Personally at the end of the day you need to be able to look in the mirror and like your reflection. Like the person who is looking back at you. Peaceful sleep is important. Don’t go to sleep having things on your mind, feeling anxious about things or feeling guilty or resentful. Whatever you need to do in life to make sure that when you look in the mirror you like your reflection and you can go to sleep peacefully, do that.
What are you most grateful for?
My own resilience. Resilience is a muscle you exercise; it’s not something you’re born with.
What is the reason for bringing this podcast to life? 0:46
To share with you people that have helped and inspired me along the way, so that you can learn from them as well. To make it easier for you to be overcome those obstacles that will come your way, by providing you with information, insight, tools and practical strategies to really overcome those dips, so that you can have more peace. And that you can grow and achieve bigger and bigger heights in your life.
How did Anna get started on her life journey has been a coach and having her own business and finding her life's purpose? 1:00
Key advice on what you should know from an early age, when you're just starting out. 6:56
What challenges made Anna decide that she wanted to become a coach and have her own business? 7:41
After 6 months of working at a music and marketing entertainment company. She went in and asked for a raise and they told her to come back and check within a couple of week. But instead of a raise, she got fired in the next couple of weeks. So then and there she identified what she wanted to do, which was to become a coach and have her own business. She had 10 jobs in 6 years.
What is the best way to learn something? 9:27
Model somebody who has already done it and is also ahead of you
What were the step taken to start her online business? 10:06
How can these steps help you to start your online business? 10:30
Grow your audience before you have a service or product to offer.
What are some of the mistakes that people make when they want to start their own business? 10:38
What does Anna encourage you do as you are on your path through life? 10:47
1. If there is something you want to do the best thing you can do it start
2. Don't wait until you are good enough or smart enough
How starting her own business changed her life completely? 12:44
What is the essential part of living a life with purpose? 13:42
1. The inner purpose 13:47
2. Outer purpose 14:03
What is the formula to finding your life purpose? 14:12
Empowering advice you need to know. 14:56
It is so important to start before you're ready. Wherever you are in your business or on the path. If you haven't started yet or if you are taking your business to the next level. listen to that whisper and take some small immediate action today towards what you really want in your heart.
Why is it important to attach a purpose to a goal? 15:28
A purpose driven goal is way more meaningful and helps you break through those difficult times and those tough starts. When you have that purpose it allows you to propel you through the resistance because there will be resistance.
What is [your name] purpose in life? 15:46
Her purpose is help you create an amazing life and business for yourself. So you can make money doing what you love and sharing your greatest gifts with the world.
What happens when you live in alignment with your purpose and own your worth? 15:56
When you live in alignment with your purpose and own your worth, you create freedom for yourself and other people feel that. When you shine your light other people feel that and it creates as ripple effect. I would love for you to wake up in the morning excited and happy. Excited about work, excited about your life, excited about what you can give on this planet.